#1: Black Ops Spidops
Every season, a team tour comes around that requires ambiguously guess-driven power rankings. Everyone puts 8 names in a McDonalds Ice Cream machine and pulls the lever to see what comes out. But this year, things are different. This year, Gamefreak has blessed us with the most magical addition to mons since Mega Pikachu. This year, we have Spidops. And the Black Ops Spidops are so far above the rest of the pack that putting them at #1 was unanimous amongst all 19 UUFPL Councilpersons from all 3 regions and planetary systems. Let's start with their SV: They've got UU Councilperson KM, who is historically great and creative at CG UU, and this year has been having decent tour success right from the start. Maybe he won't win all of his games (though he could!), but he will definitely always bring something fresh and can dish out ideas to all the others. Chaos23333 shares the name with Smogon's owner and while he hasn't played much SV (that I know of) he was an extremely solid and scary SS UU player just months ago while it was CG. Tal0 may not have the credentials of the former two, but has shown some promise already with a deep Masters run and will have plenty of support. And DugZa, leading the team as manager and SV Unlimited player, will no doubt be dedicated to his team and has always been a solid CG player, making multiple circuit POffs last year including UU Circuit. With such a solid CG LU you would assume their oldgens is where it slows down, but it does not. Heysup is by and large the best DPP in the entire pool. He might get lucked out of a couple of games but he's no doubt a unanimous #1. Alkione in ADV seems like a stretch if you didn't watch ALT PL. If you did watch it, then you know that he actually went 4-0 in ADV UU in that tour (including a win against his teammate Heysup!) F1shingRod might be the last GSC UU main (that actually wants to play it) on Smogon besides Estarossa. Melbelle is a proven RBY UU winner with multiple positive showings in RBY UU tours which somehow keep going unnoticed as evidenced by the 3k pricetag. Tack is a BW UU veteran that can easily go 7-0 if he turns on the jets. And Spitfire plays in every single PL ever on Smogon with probably 100+ wins already this year throughout all 31 tours he's played in, so you know he will grab some wins in ORAS. Inder is also a very solid overall SS player, and the SS pool is very top heavy this year so he should be able to go positive. The only "question mark" (I guess?) are xujing in SM since I'm not sure he's ever really played there, but it's a fairy gen so I'm sure he can adapt quickly. And their bench covers all their bases with iKiQ covering the ancient gens well, Huargensy covering the middle gens, and baconeatinassassin covering the new gens. It is the most complete team that we have ever seen in any tournament in all of competitive gaming history and possibly all games generally in the history of the world.
#2: Dolliv Garden
The most important measurement of a team success is the team camaraderie. And at Dolliv Garden when you're here, you're family. After blowing the bank for 30k credits on kythr (who is easily a Top 3 SV UU starter for this tour), and trading for hjkhj (who had a dominant ORAS record last year), the Garden has one of the best overall lineups with no visible weaknesses. Javi and romanji are perfectly respectable SV UU starters here, Beraldo is a great overall mons player playing SV Unlimited, and Indigo Plateau gets to breathe some fresh air away from his disappointing UUPL SV record and fall back to a tier he's know well for years in SM UU. TeamCharm barely missed the cut for UU Circuit playoffs last year, so him in SS is sure to produce positive results. Going down to BW-RBY, it's a bit more of a question mark, but the potential is there for sure. Danny is a great pokemon player, but he hasn't really played much BW UU at all so he's going to have to learn quick. Felines I'm not sure has played any DPP UU either. EllingtonReborn though is probably the most enthusiastic ADV UU player in the pool and while she doesn't have any big tour results (probably simply from lack of opportunity) it's clear she understands the tier very well. TLTK is a career GSC lower tiers player and should do fine there depending on how much/little he memes each week. Nicole is an outstanding RBY NU player, which could transfer to RBY UU? Who knows though, if things don't end up working out for these slots then they could end up being a middle of the pack team. But the team definitely has potential to do big things if everything clicks in the right direction.
#3: Dave's Dudunsparces
UUFPL is a tour of opportunity, where fresh new faces in the UU scene finally get their chance to partake in a Smogon Team Tour, where they can learn the ins and outs of competition, establish new friendships, be provided positive mentorship, and bud their young talents as they ascend to become the UU stars of tomorrow. In keeping up with this spirit and mission, the Dudunsparces have placed 5 SPL starters in their own starting lineup (Lily in SS, Leru in SM, Fc in RBY, Monai in SV, Sylvi in ORAS), with budding young future UU hopefuls like SOMALIA in BW UU rounding it off. Jokes aside, they do have some newer talent, but that's probably because they ran out of money midway through the auction and probably drew straws on who to pick next. But they are so top heavy that they should probably end up winning 80% of their games with their top half of players, meaning the others just have to pull out a few clutch wins to push this team over the top each week. Dex and tier are also very solid mons players outside of SV UU that can very easily put up good records with the right team support (which should absolutely not be a problem for this team). Aqua Jet is unfortunately thrown into an extremely competitive SV Unlimited pool where there doesn't seem to be any indication he will have success since we have barely any sample size of his SV tour play so far this year. But if Cubic Skunk in DPP, LBN in ADV, and Lialiabeast in GSC can win just 30% or more of their games then it's very possible this team ends up at the very top of the standings at the end of the year. If they can't, then the Larry Davids will have to curb their enthusiasm at the end of the season.
#4- Knights of Baxcalibur
Rising UU stars Totomon and Slip take a shot at managing a UU team tour and end up with a modest tournament ranking in the middle of the pack. Their gens 1-3 lineup is very strong and consistent with both HANTSUKI and Mystras Leoxes having performance in higher stakes UU tours like UUPL and UUSD, with the latter actually liking GSC (a rare sight), and Sabelette who recently played in ALT PL and ended up with a positive record. Beyond this strong core, sanguine is very experienced in BW and without the pressure of managing could definitely put up strong results. Rounding the main players off, Parpar has been involved in SV UU a lot through participation in tours, notably making a high placement in the Kickoff tour, and should have fresh ideas from his involvement in UUPL as well as provide ADV support. The rest of the team lacks the luster of the aforementioned players and are relatively more unproven. Takatk I haven’t seen in SS UU but considering they were traded for hjkhj which is a top tier ORAS player I assume they are good. TMM hasn't seen UU team tour action for a while, and even back then I'm not sure how much SM UU they really played, so it's uncertain how well they can pick up SM again and perform in a fairly competitive pool. One Last Kiss is a good player but also ranks low compared to the ORAS pool. Team manager Slip takes a shot at DPP UU, a tier we haven’t seen him play much, so it’s up in the air on whether he can perform in a gen much different than SS and SV UU. The notable flaw is the standard SV slots, which haven’t really had notable success this generation. UnzipsCrogre is a returning proven player from prior UUFPLs while Goro Yagami is a newer but very active player, and Rasche is just generally unproven, meaning the current gen lineup has some positive traits but really needs that extra push to show where they really stand in the rankings. Knights of Baxcalibur have a lot of strong slots as well as a lot of slots that need improvement, ending up with a middle ranking for the time being. They can easily make playoffs, but in perhaps the most competitive UUFPL yet everyone will need to boost to 110% to ensure success.
#5: Shroodles & Company
The UUFPL creator himself justdrew returns with a new co, a brand new team, but the same hunger and drive for a UUFPL championship. This time, though, he's gonna have to put a lot of time into mentoring his players if he hopes to achieve to success. There's likely no other manager besides drew that focuses on the importance of developing new talent, but his refusal to spend big money on anyone this time around may have been a little too costly in itself. They don't really have any superstar names in the respective tiers. Xiri is very good and will likely do just fine in the shallow DPP pool, but their other veterans will have a harder time as innovamania faces a strong ADV pool, Real FV13 faces an even stronger BW pool, and kjdaas probably needs much support in ORAS. As for the rest, they are fresh faces in their tiers that are going to need some mentorship. Tree has shown good RBY UU results but it has all been very recent and whether or not he can consistently perform well remains to be seen. Kenny is an enthusiastic GSC player, but also lacks any real tour success in the tier. JustFranco was a good SS UU Player back in 2021 but I'm not sure how much he kept up with the trends towards the end of the CG last year. Mom Lover and Fragments aren't exactly "new" players, but Fragments is fairly new to the UU scene while Mom Lover probably only dabbled in SM UU in the past. NHelioX and TyCarter are very promising new SV UU players, but their talent is still a bit raw so we will see how it all plays out. Fortunately the Shroodles also have some good depth. Tlenit on the bench (at the moment) can luckily help bring a strong veteran presence, while RampageWebber is probably a starting caliber SV UU player on most other teams. Ainzcrad is also very solid and can probably fill into multiple slots should they end up struggling. And while Noah is still looking for his UU legs, he brings a lot of enthusiasm to the team. Overall, the Shroodles are a solid team. But they're a bit raw in a lot of slots and aren't exactly going to knock your socks off.
#6- Skeledirges of the Sea
Unfortunately Estarossa has fallen into the same trap of years prior- drafts a strong old gens line up but leaves current gen much to be desired. MrSoup and Unowndragon are two fantastic players at the top of their pool, and Estarossa’s support to the former will further solidify their success. Estarossa himself will return to SM and ranks highly among the pool, while Dingbat navigates familiar waters in BW and will likely produce positive results. Spellcaster is also rated in the top half of the SV Unlimited pool and has plenty of resources from UUPL to achieve success. However, the team’s shortcomings become a lot more apparent. Scalescale, a notable ORAS player, finds themselves into SV UU, a tier we haven’t seen much from them, making the transition potentially tricky with the dynamics of terastallization, or so we thought as after writing this we see them score a huge win over Kythr, bumping up our confidence in them. Burstbean is relatively unknown but may shine in a dire DPP pool. Meanwhile, both giove97 and autumn, the remainder of the SV UU lineup, has yet to be relatively proven compared to other players. I’ve seen zoe talk a lot in the discord during the SS UU era but I have no idea if they played the tier much, while Mossy Sandwich and Queen of Bean find themselves in two of the most stacked pools in ADV and ORAS, making it troublesome to find success. However, both Rae and Fathiryxi are capable substitutes that can potentially turn the team around if needed, and Corporate Donkey might shine in UUFPL with his enthusiasm provided he doesn’t self-sabotage by using Krookodile in a gen other than SM. The Skeledirges are not necessarily bad and nearly half their slots are strong, but have a lot to prove in terms of their other tiers to make it to the playoffs.
#7- Gilderoy Lokix
Gilderoy Lokix features returning manager Dunoks as well as new co Jeza P. to try to take the UUFPL title after barely missing out on playoffs last year. Unfortunately, apart from a select few slots, the team struggles to stand out. Liam (Amukamara) is one of the best UU players around and should do amazing in ORAS as well as support numerous old-gens. In fact, Liam is the only back to back MVP award winner in UUFPL history, speaking to how much he provides for his team. Additionally, both Dunoks and gorex are rated very highly in their respective tiers in SS and ADV. Ice Yazu comes off from ALT PL with being rated as one of the best in the RBY pool. We haven’t seen much of GoldCat in BW UU but they are a great BW RU player and with Liam support they should produce good results. The rest of the team doesn’t keep up the hype; Attribute was cited to not have played SM UU before, although it could be mindgames from the Cetitans (I do not give enough of a fuck to actually check), and surfy is a relatively unknown figure in a dedicated GSC pool. The SV regular slots are a mixed bag; jawabarat made it pretty far in masters, but Hurtadoo and Gei have a lot more to prove too as relatively unknown faces to UU. Hydreigon>Latias makes his UUFPL debut, which is nice to see as he’s a decent player and his attitude has improved a lot, and while he puts up more of a fight in the regular SV pool, we are unsure how he can do in the unlimited pool with tougher opponents in addition to more pressure. As for the subs, Banbadoro is an old-gens fiend that should do well as a potential swap in for a struggling old gen, but there isn’t too much to say about spoo and mimilimi, reflecting the unknown means of this team and whether they will defy their low ranking and find success or fail to achieve important wins. Liam is strong, but he can’t be everywhere at once, meaning the rest of Gilderoy Lokix need to step up and show their potency to reach playoffs
#8- Attack on Cetitan
With PRs, someone has to be last, and Attack on Cetitan didn’t attack hard enough during the draft to escape last place. Being honest, they can definitely put up a fight against the lower half and even some of the upper half, but a fair amount of their slots have flaws. Let’s start with the good though. Pif is the best rated SV UU player by far and should do great as well as provide valuable support, and Kev has had a good Masters run and should thrive with pif's building support. Udongirl is a strong UUPL level player that should compete very well in a strong SV Unlimited Pool, and stunner047 has proven to be a successful and reliable RBY option. Avarice’s swiss army knife potential should come through as a key player in most old gens as well as support in SV and SM, and he should perform just fine in an average DPP pool, plus hariyana’s support should play an incremental role in this team’s DPP success. The rest of the team are either question marks or just plain hopefuls. Azick might be ok in SV UU but unlike their monotype counterpart Kev there isn't much of a track record here. Sulo has probably never played ADV UU at any sort of high level before. Jay I'm not sure has played much ORAS UU at all. Chub is a great GSC NU player, but unlike MrSoup I haven't really seen him play any GSC UU, though hopefully for the Cetitans it transfers over. I don't remember the last time basaninho played SM UU in a UU team tour but it must have been like 2020, but he could still be very capable. Liz Angeles was a great rising SS UU star at the end of the gen but it was a little too late to really gain any traction in most tours and it remains to be seen if they can compete in this setting against a top heavy SS pool. Feaniix is a great BW player in other BW tiers, so maybe they can work some magic there. All in all, the Cetitans aren't BAD, really. If 2-3 of their players exceed expectations they can easily make a playoff push. But somebody has to be last, and in the year 2023, that somebody is Attack on Cetitan.