Stratos
Banned deucer.
Hello, it’s Pwnemon, celebrating my return here to Smogon with a brand new warstory! The last warstory that I wrote (yes, I did write a warstory oh say ten months ago) got a lot of helpful criticism – mostly regarding the fact that both my opponent and I played like bona fide dunderheads and that I kept calling SR “Stealth Rocks.” Well, I bring you a new narrative, where at least half of that is fixed! Introducing Pwnemon vs taylor!
My Team:
I had actually just made this team that very day, but for some reason it didn’t suck as much as all my other teams. The main idea of the team is quite simple: survive. I mostly built it with resistance synergy in mind as opposed to momentum or a central sweeper or something like that, so I guess that the best idea is “balanced.”
taylor’s Team:
[/hide]
Battle between Pwnemon and taylor started!
Tier: Standard OU
Variation: +24, -8
Rule: Rated
Rule: Sleep Clause
Rule: Species Clause
Rule: Wifi Battle
Okay, looking at his team I immediately notice two things: number one, the spread. +24 means this battle is gonna be no joke. Then I see the RotoBro combo, and the situation gets even graver. Celebi can singlehandedly crush ScRotom, but Landorus outspeeds my entire team and is walled only by Slowbro, who is coincidentally hammered by Rotom. I’ve beaten these cores in the past with this team, but it’ll take a lot of smart switching to pull this off. That in mind, I decide to go with Mienshao, my typical lead, as he can give me an advantage off the bat usually.
Pwnemon sent out Mienshao!
taylor sent out Celebi!
This is a good matchup. Mienshao outspeeds Celebi and gets a quick KO with U-turn. Normally I lead with Fake Out, but that’s really not necessary. A 6-5 lead T1 is staring me in the face and I’m not about to say no. Landorus is virtually guaranteed to rear its ugly stache, and I do carry HP Ice, but Cobalion and Terrakion are also capable of taking a U-turn and the golden rule of Turn 1 is don’t overpredict. Plus, if I U-turn out I get some quick damage, scout, and take no damage, so U-turn it is!
Turn 1
taylor called Celebi back!
taylor sent out Landorus!
Mienshao used U-turn!
It's not very effective... The foe's Landorus lost 17% of its health!
Mienshao is hurt by its life orb!
Pwnemon called Mienshao back!
Pwnemon sent out Slowbro!
Welp. Slightly disappointing that I could have made a kill, but I’m on top of this matchup and that means I retain the momentum. Landorus is definitely going to U-turn, the question is to whom. Rotom and Celebi seem like the two most likely options. Ice Beam can deal the hurt to Celebi, but so can like two thirds of my team. Rotom is a tougher nut to crack, and if I can break RotoBro, this game will get substantially easier. Deciding that a predict to Celebi is less damaging than a predict to Rotom, I go for the Thunder Wave.
Turn 2
The foe's Landorus used U-turn!
It's super-effective! Slowbro lost 27% of its health!
taylor called Landorus back!
taylor sent out Celebi!
Slowbro used Thunder Wave!
The foe's Celebi was paralyzed!
Slowbro restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Of course, he goes to Celebi. Whether he thought along the same lines I did and outplayed me or whether I just lost a coin flip I don’t know, but he’s on top of the momentum ladder right now. I don’t yet know anything about this Celebi, but I can assume that staying in with Slowbro is not the wisest option. I try to minimize my use of Hydreigon as a defensive pivot because once that sucker loses HP it’s never coming back. My other two grass resists are Celebi and Heatran, and while Heatran originally looks nice, again I don’t know anything about this Celebi and for all I know it carries Earth Power. For all I know, it carries U-turn, but there are little red buttons in the corners of windows for a reason and -8 points won’t kill me.
Turn 3
Pwnemon called Slowbro back!
Pwnemon sent out Celebi!
The foe's Celebi used Stealth Rock!
Pointed stones float in the air around Pwnemon's team!
That’s a revealing, damaging turn. I’m pretty sure this Celebi is defensive, and thus doesn’t carry Earth Power, now, and that I have no harm done in boosting up. I don’t really know what I was thinking here – I guess that I thought he would go for an HP fire? Anyway, I Nasty Plot with Landorus still around because I am intelligent!
Turn 4
taylor called Celebi back!
taylor sent out Landorus!
Celebi used Nasty Plot!
Celebi's Special Attack sharply rose!
I have two choices here: I can go to Slowbro and keep on in an infinite loop, with, of course, the one exception that he put Stealth Rock on my field. On the other hand, I can switch it up, go to Mienshao on the U-turn. I’ll at least get minimal damage with Fake Out and get out unscathed thanks to Regenerator.
Turn 5
Pwnemon called Celebi back!
Pwnemon sent out Mienshao!
Pointed stones dug into Mienshao!
The foe's Landorus used U-turn!
It's not very effective... Mienshao lost 23% of its health!
taylor called Landorus back!
taylor sent out Tyranitar!
The foe's Tyranitar's Sand Stream whipped up a sandstorm!
The sandstorm rages!
Mienshao is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Sweet! Amazing! I don’t just get Fake Out damage here. To paraphrase the Epic Rap Battles of History, Mienshao against Tyranitar is just too bad, cause after this Britain is gonna lose a sand-spewing rock behemoth.
Turn 6
The foe's Tyranitar used Earthquake!
Mienshao lost 64% of its health!
Mienshao fainted!
The sandstorm rages!
SCORE 6-5 TAYLOR
YEAHHHHHHHHHHHH. On second thought, I probably should have seen that coming. I don’t think even the very bottom of the ladder players would switch a non-scarfed Tyranitar into a Mienshao, so I sort of have no excuse for that. Eh, whatever. Loss of a Pokemon is the ultimate momentum theft, especially to a Choice mon. taylor has no spinner. Do I need another excuse to send in Donphan?
Pwnemon sent out Donphan!
Pointed stones dug into Donphan!
Spinning is temporary. Especially since Celebi is his SR setter, it’s pretty futile to spin. I’ll just have to find a way to get Donphan right back in, which is basically kill something else. On the other hand, Stealth Rock is permanent. Especially since taylor is running a VoltTurn team, I don’t think I’ll have another chance to damage him this much for the rest of the match.
Turn 7
taylor called Tyranitar back!
taylor sent out Celebi!
Donphan used Stealth Rock!
Pointed stones float in the air around taylor's team!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Celebi is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Donphan restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Well, that turn went well enough. With Celebi out, my logic is simple. Heatran hard counters Celebi all day. I figure with sand damage and Stealth Rock, I can outwall taylor until his team is weak enough for a Hydreigon sweep, so it’s go through the motions time!
Turn 8
Pwnemon called Donphan back!
Pwnemon sent out Heatran!
Pointed stones dug into Heatran!
The foe's Celebi used Giga Drain!
It's not very effective... Heatran lost 4% of its health!
Heatran had its energy drained!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Celebi is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Heatran restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Just as I expected, Celebi deals a grand total of jack shit after Leftovers. Now I don’t want to play recklessly on a defensive game such as this one, and this Celebi may still have Earth Power, or, more plausibly, Thunder Wave. I have Protect for scouting and I’m going to use it. At the very worst, all that happens is I get Leftovers recovery and have to switch out.
Turn 9
taylor called Celebi back!
taylor sent out Rotom-W!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Rotom-W!
Heatran used Protect!
But it failed!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Heatran restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Okay, the very worst happened, not that it’s a really big deal. Celebi is a great matchup for Rotom. Volt Switch or Hydro Pump, neither hurt Celebi. What a man.
Turn 10
Pwnemon called Heatran back!
Pwnemon sent out Celebi!
Pointed stones dug into Celebi!
The foe's Rotom-W used Trick!
The foe's Rotom-W switched items with Celebi!
The foe's Rotom-W obtained one Leftovers!
Celebi obtained one Choice Scarf!
The sandstorm rages!
Celebi is buffeted by the sandstorm!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!
The foe's Rotom-W restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Yup. Celebi takes nothing from Volt Switch or Hydro Pump. Unfortunately, I’m not the only guy who gets four moves on his Pokemon. What did we learn here? Don’t underestimate your opponent. When you underestimate your opponent, you get Tricked a Scarf. When you get Tricked a Scarf, you get locked into one move. When you get locked into one move, your trainer thinks you’re worthless. When your trainer thinks you’re worthless, you get sacked. Don’t get sacked. Look at the split. Anyway, my goal right now is to take down Landorus as soon as possible. When I do, Hydreigon can come in and start B52ing things. Landorus is probably coming in right now, and Celebi’s best damage is with Giga Drain, so Giga Drain it is.
Turn 11
taylor called Rotom-W back!
taylor sent out Cobalion!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Cobalion!
Celebi used Giga Drain!
It's not very effective... The foe's Cobalion lost 24% of its health!
The foe's Cobalion had its energy drained!
The sandstorm rages!
Celebi is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Cobalion is on his team? Really? This is a new development. I do not remember this.
As of right now I don’t know much about Cobalion. He’s 5hkoed by Celebi, he’s not carrying Leftovers, oh, right, his STABs are walled by Slowbro. Staying in is not an option, so it’s not hard to determine what to do.
Turn 12
Pwnemon called Celebi back!
Pwnemon sent out Slowbro!
Pointed stones dug into Slowbro!
The foe's Cobalion used Work Up!
The foe's Cobalion's Attack rose!
The foe's Cobalion's Special Attack rose!
The sandstorm rages!
Slowbro is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Slowbro restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Work Up is a set I have never seen Cobalion run. Postmortem I see that it’s not even on Smogon, and I really have no clue what to expect. I assume three attacks, because otherwise Work Up would be wasted. CC, X-Scissor, and HP Ice would be my guess, and since a CB Terrakion X-Scissor is a 3HKO, I feel more than safe going for the Scald.
Turn 13
The foe's Cobalion used Volt Switch!
It's super-effective! Slowbro lost 46% of its health!
taylor called Cobalion back!
taylor sent out Rotom-W!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Rotom-W!
Slowbro used Scald!
It's not very effective... The foe's Rotom-W lost 14% of its health!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Slowbro is buffeted by the sandstorm!
The foe's Rotom-W restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Slowbro restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
So apparently, running Volt Switch on a boosting sweeper was a good idea and nobody told me? Yeah, I don’t get it. Well, whatever. Slowbro barely even felt it (after regenerator) and I managed to dish some hurt onto Rotom. Sadly, there was no burn, but all damage is good damage in my book, especially that which cannot be recovered. I’m now in a pretty nasty position, with an angry looking Rotom with three moves, one of which I do not know but assume is Will-O-Wisp or Hidden Power. The former is shrugged off by Celebi and the latter is – we’ll just hope it’s the former, OK?
Turn 14
Pwnemon called Slowbro back!
Pwnemon sent out Celebi!
Pointed stones dug into Celebi!
The foe's Rotom-W used Volt Switch!
It's not very effective... A critical hit! Celebi lost 26% of its health!
taylor called Rotom-W back!
taylor sent out Landorus!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Landorus!
The sandstorm rages!
Celebi is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Okay, right around here I am overcome with a sudden rage. I ain’t your little bitch, switching around passively while you walk your momentum all over me! I’m in charge of my own destiny, man! I ain’t a part of your system! I’m an adult!
Other than that, no, there is no reason for what I do next.
Turn 15
Celebi used Giga Drain!
The foe's Landorus lost 51% of its health!
The foe's Landorus had its energy drained!
(Okay really idk what the hell is going on with Landorus’s item. He didn’t deal enough damage to Slowbro to be Banded, he’s too slow to be scarfed, he doesn’t have LO or Lefties. He never changed moves, but I just have to assume he has an Expert Belt because nothing else makes sense. Nevertheless, while I was in this battle I didn’t even notice I had outsped and for some reason finished the battle still believing Landorus was Scarfed, so my commentary will continue this way)
The foe's Landorus used U-turn!
It's super-effective! Celebi lost 60% of its health!
Celebi fainted!
SCORE 6-4 TAYLOR
taylor called Landorus back!
taylor sent out Rotom-W!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Rotom-W!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!
The foe's Rotom-W restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Think, Pwnemon. For once in your life, think. You’re down 6-4, but your four are all healthy. Your Mienshao is gone. So is your Celebi, so you have no hard counter to Rotom. Speaking of Rotom, it outspeeds and kills three of your Pokemon. You have one free switch. Make it count.
Just kidding. How tough did you really think this decision was?
Pwnemon sent out Hydreigon!
Pointed stones dug into Hydreigon!
There is no overexamination here. I’ve been trying all game to get Hydreigon in safely, and for once, he is. Bombs away!
shitting your pants is entirely forgivable
Turn 16
taylor called Rotom-W back!
taylor sent out Terrakion!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Terrakion!
Hydreigon used Draco Meteor!
The foe's Terrakion lost 65% of its health!
Hydreigon's Special Attack sharply fell!
The sandstorm rages!
Hydreigon is buffeted by the sandstorm!
[size=”1”]Pwnemon: No wonder I’m down, it’s vs taylor!
Pwnemon: Never even noticed that until now, lol[/size]
In case you’re wondering, yes, this is actual dialogue from the battle and yes, it is actually the point at which I looked up and realized who I was facing. Time to buckle down. I’m not losing to taylor. My horribly misplaced pride is too great for that. Unfortunately, I’ve played myself into quite a pickle so far, losing two members of my team, and that means I’ll have to be perfect from here on out. Ah, who am I kidding. What I mean is, taylor better start sucking, and fast.
Terrakion could either be Scarfed, Banded, or Boosting. For this exercise, let us simplify this to Things Hydreigon Outspeeds and Things Which Cause Ragequits. taylor already has a scarfed Rotom, a scarfed Tyranitar, and a scarfed Landorus. Will he have a scarfed Terrakion? I doubt it. Draco Meteor for the kill!
Turn 17
Hydreigon used Draco Meteor!
The foe's Terrakion lost 28% of its health!
The foe's Terrakion fainted!
Hydreigon's Special Attack sharply fell!
The sandstorm rages!
Hydreigon is buffeted by the sandstorm!
taylor sent out Cobalion!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Cobalion!
SCORE: 5-4 TAYLOR
Finally I get a kill. I assume that he was banded, not that it matters anymore. Locked into a -4 Dragon move vs a Steel type is not exactly where I want to be. Slowbro has already demonstrated an inability to handle Cobalion and it’s not hard to guess whether Heatran can, which means Donphan is up. Here’s hoping that fourth move wasn’t HP Ice, then, and then an ineffective EQ!
Turn 18
Pwnemon called Hydreigon back!
Pwnemon sent out Donphan!
Pointed stones dug into Donphan!
The foe's Cobalion used Hidden Power!
It's super-effective! Donphan lost 39% of its health!
The sandstorm rages!
Donphan restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
But of course. The way Donphan’s HP is now, he can take another Hidden Power and retaliate with Earthquake. Judging from the past, Celebi has been his answer to Donphan. With my offensive spread, Fire Fang should KO Cobalion or Celebi, or at least majorly dent each. It’s also the only move (excluding rapid spin) that can hit Rotom, the other potential switch.
Turn 19
taylor called Cobalion back!
taylor sent out Celebi!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Celebi!
Donphan used Earthquake!
It's not very effective... The foe's Celebi lost 19% of its health!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Celebi is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Donphan restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
So, uh, yeah. I ran a calc, and in case you’re wondering what I was smoking, Fire Fang would not have killed either of them. I refused to stand for that blasphemy, so I went for Earthquake, which would at least have killed Cobalion. Of course, he didn’t feel like HP Icing again, so now taylor has the momentum yet again.
Finally I feel like I’ve scouted this Celebi enough to know the limits of its potential. I’m fairly confident that it does not carry Thunder Wave. What does non-thunderwave carrying Celebi have lots of trouble with? DRAGONS. Especially big, scary, three-headed, fire breathing dragons with exceptionally fashionable scarves.
Turn 20
taylor called Celebi back!
taylor sent out Landorus!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Landorus!
Pwnemon called Donphan back!
Pwnemon sent out Hydreigon!
Pointed stones dug into Hydreigon!
The sandstorm rages!
Hydreigon is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Crap, I’ve been outpredicted. I assume taylor knew I would be going to Hydreigon and went to the one thing that could scare it out: scarf Landobro. I really have no choice here but to switch. But let’s stop for a second and appreciate how momentous this small turn really was. Landorus is at 6%. Stealth Rock does 12%. That means after Landorus leave’s the field, he’s as good as dead. When he’s as good as dead, there is no Rotobro, and, more importantly, nothing to outspeed Hydreigon nukes. And who can force Landorus out and/or kill his ugly stache? Let’s do this once more, old buddy. For old time’s sake.
Turn 21
Pwnemon called Hydreigon back!
Pwnemon sent out Slowbro!
Pointed stones dug into Slowbro!
The foe's Landorus used U-turn!
It's super-effective! Slowbro lost 28% of its health!
taylor called Landorus back!
taylor sent out Rotom-W!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Rotom-W!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Slowbro is buffeted by the sandstorm!
The foe's Rotom-W restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Slowbro restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
However, even without a bro, Rotom is still enough of a troublemaker for my team. With Celebi down for the count, Hydreigon still resists both of Rotom’s STABs. Do I want to squander the precious HP of my endgame plan? No, not necessarily. As in not at all. Is it late enough in the game for ballsy moves? Let’s find out. Donphan is immune to Volt Switch, right?
Turn 22
Pwnemon called Slowbro back!
Pwnemon sent out Donphan!
Pointed stones dug into Donphan!
The foe's Rotom-W used Volt Switch!
It had no effect!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!
The foe's Rotom-W restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Donphan restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
I’d like to say that I pondered the choices here, and realized that the only real way to get Hydreigon in was with a sack. I’d like to say I didn’t want to switch back and forth between Donphan and Slowbro until I made a prediction error. I’d like to say that I saw no better time to get Hydreigon in than right here, where Landorus was as good as dead and everything else was in OHKO range. Truth is, I forgot that Rotom had tricked away its Choice Scarf.
Turn 23
The foe's Rotom-W used Hydro Pump!
It's super-effective! Donphan lost 66% of its health!
Donphan fainted!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!
The foe's Rotom-W restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Pwnemon sent out Hydreigon!
Pointed stones dug into Hydreigon!
SCORE 5-3 TAYLOR
Okay, he’s in. Question is, what do I click?
Draco Meteor, at this point, is a no. I don’t think I’ll get many more chances to pull Hydreigon into the battle and dropping a single nuke, killing a weakened Pokemon or not killing Cobalion, then lose all my momentum. U-turn is out for a similar reason. That leaves Fire Blast or Focus Blast. On the one hand, I don’t think taylor is about to switch in Tyranitar, which means Fire Blast gets exactly one kill no matter what. Focus Blast, while not walled by anything, is more than a little notorious for its impeccable accuracy. Well, as my great-grandmother used to say, “GO BIG OR GO HOME.” Time to follow her advice. (The next few turns will be shrunk as Hydreigon sweeps errybody)
Turn 24
taylor called Rotom-W back!
taylor sent out Celebi!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Celebi!
Hydreigon used Focus Blast!
It's not very effective... The foe's Celebi lost 17% of its health!
The sandstorm rages!
Hydreigon is buffeted by the sandstorm!
The foe's Celebi is buffeted by the sandstorm!
At this point in the game I’m feeling extremely confident, as Focus Blast will be able to OHKO all four of his Pokemon. The only thing that could stop me now is a miss.
Turn 25
Hydreigon used Focus Blast!
It's not very effective... The foe's Celebi lost 16% of its health!
The foe's Celebi fainted!
The sandstorm rages!
Hydreigon is buffeted by the sandstorm!
taylor sent out Cobalion!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Cobalion!
SCORE 4-3 TAYLOR
Cobalion is out next. I guess this means he would be the least useful in taking on Slowbro and Heatran, and now taylor is just fishing for a miss so he can try and regain the momentum. On my side, all I can say is keep sweeping.
Turn 26
Hydreigon used Focus Blast!
The foe's Cobalion's Chople Berry weakened Focus Blast's power!
It's super-effective! The foe's Cobalion lost 61% of its health!
The foe's Cobalion used Close Combat!
It's super-effective! Hydreigon lost 32% of its health!
Hydreigon fainted!
The foe's Cobalion's Defense fell!
The foe's Cobalion's Special Defense fell!
The sandstorm rages!
Pwnemon sent out Slowbro!
Pointed stones dug into Slowbro!
SCORE 4-2 TAYLOR
That’s the other thing Cobalion could mean, I guess. Frustratingly, I ran a damage calc, and that attack landed smack dab in the middle of the range. A high roll and I would have KO’d right through the berry. Of course, I don’t have much room to whine, because with a lower roll, Cobalion could survive two rounds of Stealth Rock, and that becomes very pivotal later on in the match.
Now it’s time to test the strength of the defensive core this team was even built around. Hell no I’m not sending in Heatran on a Fighting type. Thanks to Regenerator, Slowbro will be able to survive anything Cobalion throws at it and heal it off completely with Slack Off. Volt Switch did less than half at +1, so I feel quite safe, thank you. Right now my mission is simple: stay healthy, and let Donphan do the rest.
Turn 27
The foe's Cobalion used Volt Switch!
It's super-effective! Slowbro lost 31% of its health!
taylor called Cobalion back!
taylor sent out Landorus!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Landorus!
The foe's Landorus fainted!
Slowbro used Slack Off!
Slowbro regained health!
The sandstorm rages!
Slowbro is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Slowbro restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
taylor sent out Tyranitar!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Tyranitar!
Excadrill5: That’s what you get for not bein American.
SCORE 3-2 TAYLOR
That’s how you show your American pride, Excadrill5!
While the reduction in score is purely symbolic, I can see the reasoning behind sending in Landorus. You wouldn’t want an unlucky scald burn on Tyranitar, and right now Rotom at his 16% HP (after Rocks) gets knocked over by a light breeze, so Landorus was there as an insurance policy. Plus, if he wanted, taylor could have sent Cobalion right back in, who, thanks to his quad rock resistance, has just enough to live with a sliver of HP thinner than an Asian schwang.
Well the fact of the matter is, what’s past is past and Tyranitar is now staring me down with his beautiful powder blue scarf complimenting his bright red eyes. Unfortunately for taylor, the choice lock means just easy pickins. Right now I’ll leave Slowbro in, who has the manliness to tank either four Earthquakes or one Crunch. Scald will help me fish for burn, or, in the case of an unlikely switch, kill everything. If it’s Crunch, I’ll just go to Heatran and Lava Plume until I get a burn. Then it’s gg for Tyranitar. If it’s EQ, Slowbro can sit there forever and just take it like a man. Either way.
Turn 28
The foe's Tyranitar used Crunch!
It's super-effective! Slowbro lost 52% of its health!
Slowbro used Scald!
It's super-effective! The foe's Tyranitar lost 40% of its health!
The foe's Tyranitar was burned!
The sandstorm rages!
Slowbro is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Slowbro restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
The foe's Tyranitar is hurt by its burn!
So Scald gets me a lucky burn, although it wasn’t that small of a chance. Anyway, it wouldn’t have made much of a difference, because I would have just outstalled with Heatran. Hey, speaking of outstalling with Heatran….
Turn 29
Pwnemon called Slowbro back!
Pwnemon sent out Heatran!
Pointed stones dug into Heatran!
The foe's Tyranitar used Crunch!
It's not very effective... Heatran lost 8% of its health!
The sandstorm rages!
Heatran restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
The foe's Tyranitar is hurt by its burn!
I assume that taylor is just going to stay in and let Tyranitar die in peace, as it basically has nothing to do now that it’s burned. With that in mind, I decide to use Protect to get my Leftovers recovery instead of losing 2%. Heatran likes his health back.
Turn 30
taylor called Tyranitar back!
taylor sent out Cobalion!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Cobalion!
Heatran used Protect!
But it failed!
The sandstorm rages!
Heatran restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Of course, he could switch, in which case Lava Plume would be a better option. Do I have a problem with Protect spam? Nah. Anyway, once Cobalion leaves the field, it’s as good as dead. The same is true with Rotom. They each have one shot. Right now I have this feeling that taylor is gonna try to capitalize on that one shot and go for the Close Combat. Even if he Volt Switches, it’s not enough to kill, so Slowbro is my answer.
Turn 31
Pwnemon called Heatran back!
Pwnemon sent out Slowbro!
Pointed stones dug into Slowbro!
The foe's Cobalion used Close Combat!
It's not very effective... Slowbro lost 14% of its health!
The foe's Cobalion's Defense fell!
The foe's Cobalion's Special Defense fell!
The sandstorm rages!
Slowbro is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Slowbro restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Pwnemon: the only thing that kills me is Volt Switch
Pwnemon: you do that, you lose Cobalion
Pwnemon: this is definitely down to the wire...
This is the turn that will make or break the game. taylor gets to wait for like three minutes as I ponder my move. Cobalion has a move to kill either of my Pokemon (unfortunately, at this point, Slowbro was at 28% or something just below the threshold.) I really don’t know what to do. No matter what, this game is down to a coin flip. It’s completely luck. However you slice it, a Cobalion/Rotom volt switch in succession can kill a friendless Slowbro. A Hydro Pump/EQ combo (actually, no combo necessary: either one is a KO) kills my Heatran. It really just falls down to a coin flip.
I go to Heatran.
Turn 32
Pwnemon called Slowbro back!
Pwnemon sent out Heatran!
Pointed stones dug into Heatran!
The foe's Cobalion used Volt Switch!
Heatran lost 10% of its health!
taylor called Cobalion back!
taylor sent out Rotom-W!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Rotom-W!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!
The foe's Rotom-W restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Heatran restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
yesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyes. Now mind you, I’m not out of the woods yet, but Cobalion is down for the count, so the game is essentially 2-2. Better yet, it’s 2-2 and none of his Pokemon have >25% health. Once Rotom exits stage right, he’s in the same boat as Cobalion (after Sandstorm damage, he’ll faint.) I just have to play smart a couple more turns…
For now, I’m going to scout his Rotom (all scouting is non-legally binding and used mostly for Leftovers recovery purposes) with Protect, as I don’t really have much better to do and I might as well get health.
Turn 33
Heatran used Protect!
Heatran protected itself!
The foe's Rotom-W used Hydro Pump!
Heatran protected itself from the attack!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!
The foe's Rotom-W restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Heatran restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Rotom can either Volt Switch or Hydro Pump (or his third move, whatever the heck that may be.) Anyway, if Rotom uses Volt Switch, it’s a death sentence. Tyranitar can live exactly one turn with burn and Rocks. Rotom can live one turn as well. All in all, going to Slowbro looks safe.
Turn 34
Pwnemon called Heatran back!
Pwnemon sent out Slowbro!
Pointed stones dug into Slowbro!
The foe's Rotom-W used Hydro Pump!
The attack of the foe's Rotom-W missed!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Slowbro is buffeted by the sandstorm!
The foe's Rotom-W restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Slowbro restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
So I totally didn’t even wonder if two Hydro Pumps could possibly KO Slowbro, but I check now, and it couldn’t so that hax was useless. Sorry about the last couple turns being pretty anticlimax, but the battle’s gonna wind down now with taylor stuck in between a rock and a hard place and no way out.
Turn 35
The foe's Rotom-W used Hydro Pump!
It's not very effective... Slowbro lost 29% of its health!
Slowbro used Slack Off!
Slowbro regained health!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Slowbro is buffeted by the sandstorm!
The foe's Rotom-W restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Slowbro restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Nothing much to say here. Even if Slowbro dies, Heatran can win the battle with bulk, so I may as well just continue on in my slacking off to full health.
Turn 36
The foe's Rotom-W used Hydro Pump!
It's not very effective... Slowbro lost 28% of its health!
Slowbro used Slack Off!
Slowbro regained health!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Slowbro is buffeted by the sandstorm!
The foe's Rotom-W restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Slowbro restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Once more, and then I’ll go on a mercy killing rampage.
Turn 37
The foe's Rotom-W used Volt Switch!
It's super-effective! Slowbro lost 67% of its health!
taylor called Rotom-W back!
taylor sent out Cobalion!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Cobalion!
The foe's Cobalion fainted!
Slowbro used Slack Off!
Slowbro regained health!
The sandstorm rages!
Slowbro is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Slowbro restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
SCORE 2-2
And for the first time in this game since 6-6, I’m not in a deficit! This battle will now last exactly two turns, and then it’s game over. GG taylor. Send somebody in.
Pwnemon won the battle!
Oh. I guess taylor saw the writing on the wall and decided that he had better things to do with his time than finish up the battle? Eh, can’t blame him. I’m more than a little guilty of ragequits in the last few turns, and it was a great game either way. Time for everyone’s favorite (?) part of a warstory, Props and Slops!
Props:
- Heatran and Slowbro for being baller wallers.
- Hydreigon for almost late game sweeping
- Focus Miss for not missing
- taylor in general for being a great opponent with a well-built team
- aesoft for this warstory generator
- Donphan, for setting up Rocks
Slops:
- Landorus for having an indiscriminate item (probably one of them durn resist berries)
- Mienshao for dying young
- Rotom, because it’s a pain
- The way I played in general
- Congress
MVP:
You may be saying, “Donphan! Lol what?” but he had the single best play of the game by setting Stealth Rock on turn six. Without that, I surely would have lost the game, and for that he earns the MVP award. Way to go, you little armored elephant thing.
>>>Click to watch this replay!<<<
My Team:
I had actually just made this team that very day, but for some reason it didn’t suck as much as all my other teams. The main idea of the team is quite simple: survive. I mostly built it with resistance synergy in mind as opposed to momentum or a central sweeper or something like that, so I guess that the best idea is “balanced.”
taylor’s Team:
Battle between Pwnemon and taylor started!
Tier: Standard OU
Variation: +24, -8
Rule: Rated
Rule: Sleep Clause
Rule: Species Clause
Rule: Wifi Battle
Okay, looking at his team I immediately notice two things: number one, the spread. +24 means this battle is gonna be no joke. Then I see the RotoBro combo, and the situation gets even graver. Celebi can singlehandedly crush ScRotom, but Landorus outspeeds my entire team and is walled only by Slowbro, who is coincidentally hammered by Rotom. I’ve beaten these cores in the past with this team, but it’ll take a lot of smart switching to pull this off. That in mind, I decide to go with Mienshao, my typical lead, as he can give me an advantage off the bat usually.
Pwnemon sent out Mienshao!
taylor sent out Celebi!
This is a good matchup. Mienshao outspeeds Celebi and gets a quick KO with U-turn. Normally I lead with Fake Out, but that’s really not necessary. A 6-5 lead T1 is staring me in the face and I’m not about to say no. Landorus is virtually guaranteed to rear its ugly stache, and I do carry HP Ice, but Cobalion and Terrakion are also capable of taking a U-turn and the golden rule of Turn 1 is don’t overpredict. Plus, if I U-turn out I get some quick damage, scout, and take no damage, so U-turn it is!
Turn 1
taylor called Celebi back!
taylor sent out Landorus!
Mienshao used U-turn!
It's not very effective... The foe's Landorus lost 17% of its health!
Mienshao is hurt by its life orb!
Pwnemon called Mienshao back!
Pwnemon sent out Slowbro!
Welp. Slightly disappointing that I could have made a kill, but I’m on top of this matchup and that means I retain the momentum. Landorus is definitely going to U-turn, the question is to whom. Rotom and Celebi seem like the two most likely options. Ice Beam can deal the hurt to Celebi, but so can like two thirds of my team. Rotom is a tougher nut to crack, and if I can break RotoBro, this game will get substantially easier. Deciding that a predict to Celebi is less damaging than a predict to Rotom, I go for the Thunder Wave.
Turn 2
The foe's Landorus used U-turn!
It's super-effective! Slowbro lost 27% of its health!
taylor called Landorus back!
taylor sent out Celebi!
Slowbro used Thunder Wave!
The foe's Celebi was paralyzed!
Slowbro restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Of course, he goes to Celebi. Whether he thought along the same lines I did and outplayed me or whether I just lost a coin flip I don’t know, but he’s on top of the momentum ladder right now. I don’t yet know anything about this Celebi, but I can assume that staying in with Slowbro is not the wisest option. I try to minimize my use of Hydreigon as a defensive pivot because once that sucker loses HP it’s never coming back. My other two grass resists are Celebi and Heatran, and while Heatran originally looks nice, again I don’t know anything about this Celebi and for all I know it carries Earth Power. For all I know, it carries U-turn, but there are little red buttons in the corners of windows for a reason and -8 points won’t kill me.
Turn 3
Pwnemon called Slowbro back!
Pwnemon sent out Celebi!
The foe's Celebi used Stealth Rock!
Pointed stones float in the air around Pwnemon's team!
That’s a revealing, damaging turn. I’m pretty sure this Celebi is defensive, and thus doesn’t carry Earth Power, now, and that I have no harm done in boosting up. I don’t really know what I was thinking here – I guess that I thought he would go for an HP fire? Anyway, I Nasty Plot with Landorus still around because I am intelligent!
Turn 4
taylor called Celebi back!
taylor sent out Landorus!
Celebi used Nasty Plot!
Celebi's Special Attack sharply rose!
I have two choices here: I can go to Slowbro and keep on in an infinite loop, with, of course, the one exception that he put Stealth Rock on my field. On the other hand, I can switch it up, go to Mienshao on the U-turn. I’ll at least get minimal damage with Fake Out and get out unscathed thanks to Regenerator.
Turn 5
Pwnemon called Celebi back!
Pwnemon sent out Mienshao!
Pointed stones dug into Mienshao!
The foe's Landorus used U-turn!
It's not very effective... Mienshao lost 23% of its health!
taylor called Landorus back!
taylor sent out Tyranitar!
The foe's Tyranitar's Sand Stream whipped up a sandstorm!
The sandstorm rages!
Mienshao is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Sweet! Amazing! I don’t just get Fake Out damage here. To paraphrase the Epic Rap Battles of History, Mienshao against Tyranitar is just too bad, cause after this Britain is gonna lose a sand-spewing rock behemoth.
Turn 6
The foe's Tyranitar used Earthquake!
Mienshao lost 64% of its health!
Mienshao fainted!
The sandstorm rages!
SCORE 6-5 TAYLOR
YEAHHHHHHHHHHHH. On second thought, I probably should have seen that coming. I don’t think even the very bottom of the ladder players would switch a non-scarfed Tyranitar into a Mienshao, so I sort of have no excuse for that. Eh, whatever. Loss of a Pokemon is the ultimate momentum theft, especially to a Choice mon. taylor has no spinner. Do I need another excuse to send in Donphan?
Pwnemon sent out Donphan!
Pointed stones dug into Donphan!
Spinning is temporary. Especially since Celebi is his SR setter, it’s pretty futile to spin. I’ll just have to find a way to get Donphan right back in, which is basically kill something else. On the other hand, Stealth Rock is permanent. Especially since taylor is running a VoltTurn team, I don’t think I’ll have another chance to damage him this much for the rest of the match.
Turn 7
taylor called Tyranitar back!
taylor sent out Celebi!
Donphan used Stealth Rock!
Pointed stones float in the air around taylor's team!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Celebi is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Donphan restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Well, that turn went well enough. With Celebi out, my logic is simple. Heatran hard counters Celebi all day. I figure with sand damage and Stealth Rock, I can outwall taylor until his team is weak enough for a Hydreigon sweep, so it’s go through the motions time!
Turn 8
Pwnemon called Donphan back!
Pwnemon sent out Heatran!
Pointed stones dug into Heatran!
The foe's Celebi used Giga Drain!
It's not very effective... Heatran lost 4% of its health!
Heatran had its energy drained!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Celebi is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Heatran restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Just as I expected, Celebi deals a grand total of jack shit after Leftovers. Now I don’t want to play recklessly on a defensive game such as this one, and this Celebi may still have Earth Power, or, more plausibly, Thunder Wave. I have Protect for scouting and I’m going to use it. At the very worst, all that happens is I get Leftovers recovery and have to switch out.
Turn 9
taylor called Celebi back!
taylor sent out Rotom-W!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Rotom-W!
Heatran used Protect!
But it failed!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Heatran restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Okay, the very worst happened, not that it’s a really big deal. Celebi is a great matchup for Rotom. Volt Switch or Hydro Pump, neither hurt Celebi. What a man.
Turn 10
Pwnemon called Heatran back!
Pwnemon sent out Celebi!
Pointed stones dug into Celebi!
The foe's Rotom-W used Trick!
The foe's Rotom-W switched items with Celebi!
The foe's Rotom-W obtained one Leftovers!
Celebi obtained one Choice Scarf!
The sandstorm rages!
Celebi is buffeted by the sandstorm!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!
The foe's Rotom-W restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Yup. Celebi takes nothing from Volt Switch or Hydro Pump. Unfortunately, I’m not the only guy who gets four moves on his Pokemon. What did we learn here? Don’t underestimate your opponent. When you underestimate your opponent, you get Tricked a Scarf. When you get Tricked a Scarf, you get locked into one move. When you get locked into one move, your trainer thinks you’re worthless. When your trainer thinks you’re worthless, you get sacked. Don’t get sacked. Look at the split. Anyway, my goal right now is to take down Landorus as soon as possible. When I do, Hydreigon can come in and start B52ing things. Landorus is probably coming in right now, and Celebi’s best damage is with Giga Drain, so Giga Drain it is.
Turn 11
taylor called Rotom-W back!
taylor sent out Cobalion!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Cobalion!
Celebi used Giga Drain!
It's not very effective... The foe's Cobalion lost 24% of its health!
The foe's Cobalion had its energy drained!
The sandstorm rages!
Celebi is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Cobalion is on his team? Really? This is a new development. I do not remember this.
As of right now I don’t know much about Cobalion. He’s 5hkoed by Celebi, he’s not carrying Leftovers, oh, right, his STABs are walled by Slowbro. Staying in is not an option, so it’s not hard to determine what to do.
Turn 12
Pwnemon called Celebi back!
Pwnemon sent out Slowbro!
Pointed stones dug into Slowbro!
The foe's Cobalion used Work Up!
The foe's Cobalion's Attack rose!
The foe's Cobalion's Special Attack rose!
The sandstorm rages!
Slowbro is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Slowbro restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Work Up is a set I have never seen Cobalion run. Postmortem I see that it’s not even on Smogon, and I really have no clue what to expect. I assume three attacks, because otherwise Work Up would be wasted. CC, X-Scissor, and HP Ice would be my guess, and since a CB Terrakion X-Scissor is a 3HKO, I feel more than safe going for the Scald.
Turn 13
The foe's Cobalion used Volt Switch!
It's super-effective! Slowbro lost 46% of its health!
taylor called Cobalion back!
taylor sent out Rotom-W!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Rotom-W!
Slowbro used Scald!
It's not very effective... The foe's Rotom-W lost 14% of its health!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Slowbro is buffeted by the sandstorm!
The foe's Rotom-W restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Slowbro restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
So apparently, running Volt Switch on a boosting sweeper was a good idea and nobody told me? Yeah, I don’t get it. Well, whatever. Slowbro barely even felt it (after regenerator) and I managed to dish some hurt onto Rotom. Sadly, there was no burn, but all damage is good damage in my book, especially that which cannot be recovered. I’m now in a pretty nasty position, with an angry looking Rotom with three moves, one of which I do not know but assume is Will-O-Wisp or Hidden Power. The former is shrugged off by Celebi and the latter is – we’ll just hope it’s the former, OK?
Turn 14
Pwnemon called Slowbro back!
Pwnemon sent out Celebi!
Pointed stones dug into Celebi!
The foe's Rotom-W used Volt Switch!
It's not very effective... A critical hit! Celebi lost 26% of its health!
taylor called Rotom-W back!
taylor sent out Landorus!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Landorus!
The sandstorm rages!
Celebi is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Okay, right around here I am overcome with a sudden rage. I ain’t your little bitch, switching around passively while you walk your momentum all over me! I’m in charge of my own destiny, man! I ain’t a part of your system! I’m an adult!
Other than that, no, there is no reason for what I do next.
Turn 15
Celebi used Giga Drain!
The foe's Landorus lost 51% of its health!
The foe's Landorus had its energy drained!
(Okay really idk what the hell is going on with Landorus’s item. He didn’t deal enough damage to Slowbro to be Banded, he’s too slow to be scarfed, he doesn’t have LO or Lefties. He never changed moves, but I just have to assume he has an Expert Belt because nothing else makes sense. Nevertheless, while I was in this battle I didn’t even notice I had outsped and for some reason finished the battle still believing Landorus was Scarfed, so my commentary will continue this way)
The foe's Landorus used U-turn!
It's super-effective! Celebi lost 60% of its health!
Celebi fainted!
SCORE 6-4 TAYLOR
taylor called Landorus back!
taylor sent out Rotom-W!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Rotom-W!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!
The foe's Rotom-W restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Think, Pwnemon. For once in your life, think. You’re down 6-4, but your four are all healthy. Your Mienshao is gone. So is your Celebi, so you have no hard counter to Rotom. Speaking of Rotom, it outspeeds and kills three of your Pokemon. You have one free switch. Make it count.
Just kidding. How tough did you really think this decision was?
Pwnemon sent out Hydreigon!
Pointed stones dug into Hydreigon!
There is no overexamination here. I’ve been trying all game to get Hydreigon in safely, and for once, he is. Bombs away!
shitting your pants is entirely forgivable
Turn 16
taylor called Rotom-W back!
taylor sent out Terrakion!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Terrakion!
Hydreigon used Draco Meteor!
The foe's Terrakion lost 65% of its health!
Hydreigon's Special Attack sharply fell!
The sandstorm rages!
Hydreigon is buffeted by the sandstorm!
[size=”1”]Pwnemon: No wonder I’m down, it’s vs taylor!
Pwnemon: Never even noticed that until now, lol[/size]
In case you’re wondering, yes, this is actual dialogue from the battle and yes, it is actually the point at which I looked up and realized who I was facing. Time to buckle down. I’m not losing to taylor. My horribly misplaced pride is too great for that. Unfortunately, I’ve played myself into quite a pickle so far, losing two members of my team, and that means I’ll have to be perfect from here on out. Ah, who am I kidding. What I mean is, taylor better start sucking, and fast.
Terrakion could either be Scarfed, Banded, or Boosting. For this exercise, let us simplify this to Things Hydreigon Outspeeds and Things Which Cause Ragequits. taylor already has a scarfed Rotom, a scarfed Tyranitar, and a scarfed Landorus. Will he have a scarfed Terrakion? I doubt it. Draco Meteor for the kill!
Turn 17
Hydreigon used Draco Meteor!
The foe's Terrakion lost 28% of its health!
The foe's Terrakion fainted!
Hydreigon's Special Attack sharply fell!
The sandstorm rages!
Hydreigon is buffeted by the sandstorm!
taylor sent out Cobalion!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Cobalion!
SCORE: 5-4 TAYLOR
Finally I get a kill. I assume that he was banded, not that it matters anymore. Locked into a -4 Dragon move vs a Steel type is not exactly where I want to be. Slowbro has already demonstrated an inability to handle Cobalion and it’s not hard to guess whether Heatran can, which means Donphan is up. Here’s hoping that fourth move wasn’t HP Ice, then, and then an ineffective EQ!
Turn 18
Pwnemon called Hydreigon back!
Pwnemon sent out Donphan!
Pointed stones dug into Donphan!
The foe's Cobalion used Hidden Power!
It's super-effective! Donphan lost 39% of its health!
The sandstorm rages!
Donphan restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
But of course. The way Donphan’s HP is now, he can take another Hidden Power and retaliate with Earthquake. Judging from the past, Celebi has been his answer to Donphan. With my offensive spread, Fire Fang should KO Cobalion or Celebi, or at least majorly dent each. It’s also the only move (excluding rapid spin) that can hit Rotom, the other potential switch.
Turn 19
taylor called Cobalion back!
taylor sent out Celebi!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Celebi!
Donphan used Earthquake!
It's not very effective... The foe's Celebi lost 19% of its health!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Celebi is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Donphan restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
So, uh, yeah. I ran a calc, and in case you’re wondering what I was smoking, Fire Fang would not have killed either of them. I refused to stand for that blasphemy, so I went for Earthquake, which would at least have killed Cobalion. Of course, he didn’t feel like HP Icing again, so now taylor has the momentum yet again.
Finally I feel like I’ve scouted this Celebi enough to know the limits of its potential. I’m fairly confident that it does not carry Thunder Wave. What does non-thunderwave carrying Celebi have lots of trouble with? DRAGONS. Especially big, scary, three-headed, fire breathing dragons with exceptionally fashionable scarves.
Turn 20
taylor called Celebi back!
taylor sent out Landorus!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Landorus!
Pwnemon called Donphan back!
Pwnemon sent out Hydreigon!
Pointed stones dug into Hydreigon!
The sandstorm rages!
Hydreigon is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Crap, I’ve been outpredicted. I assume taylor knew I would be going to Hydreigon and went to the one thing that could scare it out: scarf Landobro. I really have no choice here but to switch. But let’s stop for a second and appreciate how momentous this small turn really was. Landorus is at 6%. Stealth Rock does 12%. That means after Landorus leave’s the field, he’s as good as dead. When he’s as good as dead, there is no Rotobro, and, more importantly, nothing to outspeed Hydreigon nukes. And who can force Landorus out and/or kill his ugly stache? Let’s do this once more, old buddy. For old time’s sake.
Turn 21
Pwnemon called Hydreigon back!
Pwnemon sent out Slowbro!
Pointed stones dug into Slowbro!
The foe's Landorus used U-turn!
It's super-effective! Slowbro lost 28% of its health!
taylor called Landorus back!
taylor sent out Rotom-W!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Rotom-W!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Slowbro is buffeted by the sandstorm!
The foe's Rotom-W restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Slowbro restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
However, even without a bro, Rotom is still enough of a troublemaker for my team. With Celebi down for the count, Hydreigon still resists both of Rotom’s STABs. Do I want to squander the precious HP of my endgame plan? No, not necessarily. As in not at all. Is it late enough in the game for ballsy moves? Let’s find out. Donphan is immune to Volt Switch, right?
Turn 22
Pwnemon called Slowbro back!
Pwnemon sent out Donphan!
Pointed stones dug into Donphan!
The foe's Rotom-W used Volt Switch!
It had no effect!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!
The foe's Rotom-W restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Donphan restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
I’d like to say that I pondered the choices here, and realized that the only real way to get Hydreigon in was with a sack. I’d like to say I didn’t want to switch back and forth between Donphan and Slowbro until I made a prediction error. I’d like to say that I saw no better time to get Hydreigon in than right here, where Landorus was as good as dead and everything else was in OHKO range. Truth is, I forgot that Rotom had tricked away its Choice Scarf.
Turn 23
The foe's Rotom-W used Hydro Pump!
It's super-effective! Donphan lost 66% of its health!
Donphan fainted!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!
The foe's Rotom-W restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Pwnemon sent out Hydreigon!
Pointed stones dug into Hydreigon!
SCORE 5-3 TAYLOR
Okay, he’s in. Question is, what do I click?
Draco Meteor, at this point, is a no. I don’t think I’ll get many more chances to pull Hydreigon into the battle and dropping a single nuke, killing a weakened Pokemon or not killing Cobalion, then lose all my momentum. U-turn is out for a similar reason. That leaves Fire Blast or Focus Blast. On the one hand, I don’t think taylor is about to switch in Tyranitar, which means Fire Blast gets exactly one kill no matter what. Focus Blast, while not walled by anything, is more than a little notorious for its impeccable accuracy. Well, as my great-grandmother used to say, “GO BIG OR GO HOME.” Time to follow her advice. (The next few turns will be shrunk as Hydreigon sweeps errybody)
Turn 24
taylor called Rotom-W back!
taylor sent out Celebi!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Celebi!
Hydreigon used Focus Blast!
It's not very effective... The foe's Celebi lost 17% of its health!
The sandstorm rages!
Hydreigon is buffeted by the sandstorm!
The foe's Celebi is buffeted by the sandstorm!
At this point in the game I’m feeling extremely confident, as Focus Blast will be able to OHKO all four of his Pokemon. The only thing that could stop me now is a miss.
Turn 25
Hydreigon used Focus Blast!
It's not very effective... The foe's Celebi lost 16% of its health!
The foe's Celebi fainted!
The sandstorm rages!
Hydreigon is buffeted by the sandstorm!
taylor sent out Cobalion!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Cobalion!
SCORE 4-3 TAYLOR
Cobalion is out next. I guess this means he would be the least useful in taking on Slowbro and Heatran, and now taylor is just fishing for a miss so he can try and regain the momentum. On my side, all I can say is keep sweeping.
Turn 26
Hydreigon used Focus Blast!
The foe's Cobalion's Chople Berry weakened Focus Blast's power!
It's super-effective! The foe's Cobalion lost 61% of its health!
The foe's Cobalion used Close Combat!
It's super-effective! Hydreigon lost 32% of its health!
Hydreigon fainted!
The foe's Cobalion's Defense fell!
The foe's Cobalion's Special Defense fell!
The sandstorm rages!
Pwnemon sent out Slowbro!
Pointed stones dug into Slowbro!
SCORE 4-2 TAYLOR
That’s the other thing Cobalion could mean, I guess. Frustratingly, I ran a damage calc, and that attack landed smack dab in the middle of the range. A high roll and I would have KO’d right through the berry. Of course, I don’t have much room to whine, because with a lower roll, Cobalion could survive two rounds of Stealth Rock, and that becomes very pivotal later on in the match.
Now it’s time to test the strength of the defensive core this team was even built around. Hell no I’m not sending in Heatran on a Fighting type. Thanks to Regenerator, Slowbro will be able to survive anything Cobalion throws at it and heal it off completely with Slack Off. Volt Switch did less than half at +1, so I feel quite safe, thank you. Right now my mission is simple: stay healthy, and let Donphan do the rest.
Turn 27
The foe's Cobalion used Volt Switch!
It's super-effective! Slowbro lost 31% of its health!
taylor called Cobalion back!
taylor sent out Landorus!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Landorus!
The foe's Landorus fainted!
Slowbro used Slack Off!
Slowbro regained health!
The sandstorm rages!
Slowbro is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Slowbro restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
taylor sent out Tyranitar!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Tyranitar!
Excadrill5: That’s what you get for not bein American.
SCORE 3-2 TAYLOR
That’s how you show your American pride, Excadrill5!
While the reduction in score is purely symbolic, I can see the reasoning behind sending in Landorus. You wouldn’t want an unlucky scald burn on Tyranitar, and right now Rotom at his 16% HP (after Rocks) gets knocked over by a light breeze, so Landorus was there as an insurance policy. Plus, if he wanted, taylor could have sent Cobalion right back in, who, thanks to his quad rock resistance, has just enough to live with a sliver of HP thinner than an Asian schwang.
Well the fact of the matter is, what’s past is past and Tyranitar is now staring me down with his beautiful powder blue scarf complimenting his bright red eyes. Unfortunately for taylor, the choice lock means just easy pickins. Right now I’ll leave Slowbro in, who has the manliness to tank either four Earthquakes or one Crunch. Scald will help me fish for burn, or, in the case of an unlikely switch, kill everything. If it’s Crunch, I’ll just go to Heatran and Lava Plume until I get a burn. Then it’s gg for Tyranitar. If it’s EQ, Slowbro can sit there forever and just take it like a man. Either way.
Turn 28
The foe's Tyranitar used Crunch!
It's super-effective! Slowbro lost 52% of its health!
Slowbro used Scald!
It's super-effective! The foe's Tyranitar lost 40% of its health!
The foe's Tyranitar was burned!
The sandstorm rages!
Slowbro is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Slowbro restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
The foe's Tyranitar is hurt by its burn!
So Scald gets me a lucky burn, although it wasn’t that small of a chance. Anyway, it wouldn’t have made much of a difference, because I would have just outstalled with Heatran. Hey, speaking of outstalling with Heatran….
Turn 29
Pwnemon called Slowbro back!
Pwnemon sent out Heatran!
Pointed stones dug into Heatran!
The foe's Tyranitar used Crunch!
It's not very effective... Heatran lost 8% of its health!
The sandstorm rages!
Heatran restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
The foe's Tyranitar is hurt by its burn!
I assume that taylor is just going to stay in and let Tyranitar die in peace, as it basically has nothing to do now that it’s burned. With that in mind, I decide to use Protect to get my Leftovers recovery instead of losing 2%. Heatran likes his health back.
Turn 30
taylor called Tyranitar back!
taylor sent out Cobalion!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Cobalion!
Heatran used Protect!
But it failed!
The sandstorm rages!
Heatran restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Of course, he could switch, in which case Lava Plume would be a better option. Do I have a problem with Protect spam? Nah. Anyway, once Cobalion leaves the field, it’s as good as dead. The same is true with Rotom. They each have one shot. Right now I have this feeling that taylor is gonna try to capitalize on that one shot and go for the Close Combat. Even if he Volt Switches, it’s not enough to kill, so Slowbro is my answer.
Turn 31
Pwnemon called Heatran back!
Pwnemon sent out Slowbro!
Pointed stones dug into Slowbro!
The foe's Cobalion used Close Combat!
It's not very effective... Slowbro lost 14% of its health!
The foe's Cobalion's Defense fell!
The foe's Cobalion's Special Defense fell!
The sandstorm rages!
Slowbro is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Slowbro restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Pwnemon: the only thing that kills me is Volt Switch
Pwnemon: you do that, you lose Cobalion
Pwnemon: this is definitely down to the wire...
This is the turn that will make or break the game. taylor gets to wait for like three minutes as I ponder my move. Cobalion has a move to kill either of my Pokemon (unfortunately, at this point, Slowbro was at 28% or something just below the threshold.) I really don’t know what to do. No matter what, this game is down to a coin flip. It’s completely luck. However you slice it, a Cobalion/Rotom volt switch in succession can kill a friendless Slowbro. A Hydro Pump/EQ combo (actually, no combo necessary: either one is a KO) kills my Heatran. It really just falls down to a coin flip.
I go to Heatran.
Turn 32
Pwnemon called Slowbro back!
Pwnemon sent out Heatran!
Pointed stones dug into Heatran!
The foe's Cobalion used Volt Switch!
Heatran lost 10% of its health!
taylor called Cobalion back!
taylor sent out Rotom-W!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Rotom-W!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!
The foe's Rotom-W restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Heatran restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
yesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyesyes. Now mind you, I’m not out of the woods yet, but Cobalion is down for the count, so the game is essentially 2-2. Better yet, it’s 2-2 and none of his Pokemon have >25% health. Once Rotom exits stage right, he’s in the same boat as Cobalion (after Sandstorm damage, he’ll faint.) I just have to play smart a couple more turns…
For now, I’m going to scout his Rotom (all scouting is non-legally binding and used mostly for Leftovers recovery purposes) with Protect, as I don’t really have much better to do and I might as well get health.
Turn 33
Heatran used Protect!
Heatran protected itself!
The foe's Rotom-W used Hydro Pump!
Heatran protected itself from the attack!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!
The foe's Rotom-W restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Heatran restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Rotom can either Volt Switch or Hydro Pump (or his third move, whatever the heck that may be.) Anyway, if Rotom uses Volt Switch, it’s a death sentence. Tyranitar can live exactly one turn with burn and Rocks. Rotom can live one turn as well. All in all, going to Slowbro looks safe.
Turn 34
Pwnemon called Heatran back!
Pwnemon sent out Slowbro!
Pointed stones dug into Slowbro!
The foe's Rotom-W used Hydro Pump!
The attack of the foe's Rotom-W missed!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Slowbro is buffeted by the sandstorm!
The foe's Rotom-W restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Slowbro restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
So I totally didn’t even wonder if two Hydro Pumps could possibly KO Slowbro, but I check now, and it couldn’t so that hax was useless. Sorry about the last couple turns being pretty anticlimax, but the battle’s gonna wind down now with taylor stuck in between a rock and a hard place and no way out.
Turn 35
The foe's Rotom-W used Hydro Pump!
It's not very effective... Slowbro lost 29% of its health!
Slowbro used Slack Off!
Slowbro regained health!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Slowbro is buffeted by the sandstorm!
The foe's Rotom-W restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Slowbro restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Nothing much to say here. Even if Slowbro dies, Heatran can win the battle with bulk, so I may as well just continue on in my slacking off to full health.
Turn 36
The foe's Rotom-W used Hydro Pump!
It's not very effective... Slowbro lost 28% of its health!
Slowbro used Slack Off!
Slowbro regained health!
The sandstorm rages!
The foe's Rotom-W is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Slowbro is buffeted by the sandstorm!
The foe's Rotom-W restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Slowbro restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
Once more, and then I’ll go on a mercy killing rampage.
Turn 37
The foe's Rotom-W used Volt Switch!
It's super-effective! Slowbro lost 67% of its health!
taylor called Rotom-W back!
taylor sent out Cobalion!
Pointed stones dug into the foe's Cobalion!
The foe's Cobalion fainted!
Slowbro used Slack Off!
Slowbro regained health!
The sandstorm rages!
Slowbro is buffeted by the sandstorm!
Slowbro restored a little HP using its Leftovers!
SCORE 2-2
And for the first time in this game since 6-6, I’m not in a deficit! This battle will now last exactly two turns, and then it’s game over. GG taylor. Send somebody in.
Pwnemon won the battle!
>>>Click to watch this replay!<<<
Oh. I guess taylor saw the writing on the wall and decided that he had better things to do with his time than finish up the battle? Eh, can’t blame him. I’m more than a little guilty of ragequits in the last few turns, and it was a great game either way. Time for everyone’s favorite (?) part of a warstory, Props and Slops!
Props:
- Heatran and Slowbro for being baller wallers.
- Hydreigon for almost late game sweeping
- Focus Miss for not missing
- taylor in general for being a great opponent with a well-built team
- aesoft for this warstory generator
- Donphan, for setting up Rocks
Slops:
- Landorus for having an indiscriminate item (probably one of them durn resist berries)
- Mienshao for dying young
- Rotom, because it’s a pain
- The way I played in general
- Congress
MVP:
You may be saying, “Donphan! Lol what?” but he had the single best play of the game by setting Stealth Rock on turn six. Without that, I surely would have lost the game, and for that he earns the MVP award. Way to go, you little armored elephant thing.