Syl vs. Iceman - An OU Warstory

Okay, so I’ve decided that I’d give warstory writing another shot, and I think this rematch against Syl could be some good material. So, with no further adieu, I'll get started.

Syl’s Team:


Iceman28's Team:


My comments will be in bold blue.
HP Percentages will be listed in bold green.
The score will be listed as Iceman28 - Syl, whenever needed, in bold orange.
Last, Leftovers will be omitted; they are present on the following pokemon:




Rules: Ladder Match, Sleep Clause, Freeze Clause, OHKO Clause, Evasion Clause, Species Clause, Strict Damage Clause, Soul Dew Clause
Iceman28 sent out Infernape (lvl 100 Infernape ?).
Syl sent out Jirachi (lvl 100 Jirachi).
Syl switched in Latias (lvl 100 Latias ?).
Infernape used Fake Out.
Latias lost 11% of its health.
Latias's leftovers restored its health a little!
Latias restored 6% of its health.

Infernape: 100%
Latias: 95%

The match begins the same way as last time. From that same match, I remember that Latias is a bulkyCM set, and I Stealth Rock knowing that Dragon Pulse won't KO (besides, I have a Sash).

Latias used Dragon Pulse.
Infernape lost 61% of its health.
Infernape used Stealth Rock.
Pointed stones float in the air around your foe's team!
Latias's leftovers restored its health a little!
Latias restored 5% of its health.

Infernape: 39%
Latias: 100%

Latias used Dragon Pulse.
Infernape lost 39% of its health.
Iceman28's Infernape fainted.

Infernape: 0%
Latias: 100%


Score: 5-6

So Infernape is down. Last time, I brought in Metagross to get in a strong hit, but Heatran is the switchin this time. I run Modest SpecsTran, which often catches lots of people off guard expecting Scarf or SubToxic. Dragon Pulse has great neutral coverage, and will nail Latias should he for some reason decide to stay in.

Iceman28 switched in Heatran (lvl 100 Heatran ?).
Syl switched in Rotom-w (lvl 100 Rotom-w).
Pointed stones dug into Rotom-w.
Rotom-w lost 12% of its health.
Heatran used Dragon Pulse.
Rotom-w lost 50% of its health.
Rotom-w's leftovers restored its health a little!
Rotom-w restored 6% of its health.

Heatran: 100%
Rotom-W: 44%

Good, I think, as I remember his ResTalk Rotom-W. He must have brought it in expecting HP Ice. I know that it has Hydro Pump, so I bring Breloom in to wreak havoc on his team. Rotom-W may ResTalk to deal with Spore, but it won't like powerful Seed Bombs to the face.

Iceman28 switched in Breloom (lvl 100 Breloom ?).
Syl switched in Tyranitar (lvl 100 Tyranitar ?).
Tyranitar's Sand Stream whipped up a sandstorm!
A sandstorm brewed!
Pointed stones dug into Tyranitar.
Tyranitar lost 12% of its health.
The sandstorm rages.
Breloom is buffetted by the sandstorm!
Breloom lost 6% of its health.
Tyranitar's leftovers restored its health a little!
Tyranitar restored 6% of its health.
Breloom was badly poisoned!

Breloom: 94%
Tyranitar: 94%

A double switch leaves gives me the advantage here, but I don't know what his Tyranitar runs since all it did was Crunch in the last match. A Focus Punch wouldn't be wise at this point, so I figure that he will go to Latias to absorb a Seed Bomb. I click Spore.

Syl switched in Rotom-w (lvl 100 Rotom-w).
Pointed stones dug into Rotom-w.
Rotom-w lost 12% of its health.
Breloom used Spore.
Rotom-w fell asleep!
The sandstorm rages.
Rotom-w is buffetted by the sandstorm!
Rotom-w lost 6% of its health.
Breloom is buffetted by the sandstorm!
Breloom lost 6% of its health.
Rotom-w's leftovers restored its health a little!
Rotom-w restored 6% of its health.
Breloom's Poison Heal restored health!
Breloom restored 13% of its health.

Breloom: 100%
Rotom-W: 32%

Not really what I had in mind, but it'll work. Stealth Rock combined with Heatran's Dragon Pulse has it in KO range of Seed Bomb, and once I get rid of it, I can attempt to sweep with Agiligross.

Rotom-w is fast asleep!
Rotom-w used Sleep Talk.
Rotom-w used Hydro Pump.
It's not very effective...
Breloom lost 28% of its health.
Breloom used Seed Bomb.
Rotom-w lost 31% of its health.
Syl's Rotom-w fainted.
The sandstorm rages.
Breloom is buffetted by the sandstorm!
Breloom lost 6% of its health.
Breloom's Poison Heal restored health!
Breloom restored 13% of its health.

Breloom: 79%
Rotom-W: 0%


Score: 5-5

Syl switched in Latias (lvl 100 Latias ?).
Pointed stones dug into Latias.
Latias lost 12% of its health.
Latias used Dragon Pulse.
Breloom lost 73% of its health.
Breloom used Spore.
Latias fell asleep!
The sandstorm rages.
Latias is buffetted by the sandstorm!
Latias lost 6% of its health.
Breloom is buffetted by the sandstorm!
Breloom lost 6% of its health.
Iceman28's Breloom fainted.
Latias's leftovers restored its health a little!
Latias restored 6% of its health.

Breloom: 0%
Latias: 88%


Score: 4-5

The unboosted Dragon Pulse did more than I thought it would, but at least I managed a Spore before the sand took me down. I confidently click Metagross, since there's nothing on his team (that I remember at this point) that can really take its hits.

Iceman28 switched in Metagross (lvl 100 Metagross).
Syl switched in Swampert (lvl 100 Swampert ?).
Pointed stones dug into Swampert.
Swampert lost 6% of its health.
Metagross used Agility.
Metagross's speed was sharply raised.
The sandstorm rages.
Swampert's leftovers restored its health a little!
Swampert restored 6% of its health.

Metagross: 100%
Swampert: 100%

I slap myself for forgetting Swampert. He will either set up Stealth Rock or Earthquake, I predict, so I bring in the forgotten ghost of Diamond and Pearl (no, not Dusknoir).

Iceman28 switched in Gengar (lvl 100 Gengar ?).
Gengar makes ground moves miss with Levitate!
Swampert used Earthquake.
Swampert's attack missed!
The sandstorm rages.
Gengar is buffetted by the sandstorm!
Gengar lost 6% of its health.

Gengar: 94%
Swampert: 100%

The switch goes off without a hitch, and I expect that Scizor that I remember from the last match. I know that he is aware of SubPunch - it cleanly KOd his Tyranitar in the last match. Still, a Sub is the safest choice at this point.

Syl switched in Jirachi (lvl 100 Jirachi).
Pointed stones dug into Jirachi.
Jirachi lost 6% of its health.
Gengar used Substitute.
Gengar lost 25% of its health.
Gengar made a substitute!
The sandstorm rages.
Gengar is buffetted by the sandstorm!
Gengar lost 6% of its health.

Gengar: 63%
Jirachi: 94%

Jirachi used Iron Head.
The substitute took damage for Gengar!
Gengar's substitute faded!
Gengar used Hidden Power.
It's super effective!
Jirachi lost 57% of its health.
The sandstorm rages.
Gengar is buffetted by the sandstorm!
Gengar lost 6% of its health.

Gengar: 57%
Jirachi: 37%

Both sides take some damage as my Sub breaks. I can go to either Zapdos, Heatran, or Metagross, but with Swampert still alive and well, none but Heatran will be able to do much harm. Heatran it is.

Iceman28 switched in Heatran (lvl 100 Heatran ?).
Jirachi used Iron Head.
It's not very effective...
Heatran lost 8% of its health.
The sandstorm rages.

Heatran: 92%
Jirachi: 37%

Now there are several things that could happen here. The fire attack is obvious, so I can't do that. Its either Earth Power to nail Tyranitar as it comes in, or dragon pulse to hit the floating Latias. Swampert is hit equally hard either way. I decide that the sleeping Latias is a lesser threat than allowing Tyranitar a free switch, and decide to Earth Power.

Syl switched in Latias (lvl 100 Latias ?).
Pointed stones dug into Latias.
Latias lost 12% of its health.
Latias makes ground moves miss with Levitate!
Heatran used Earth Power.
Heatran's attack missed!
The sandstorm rages.
Latias is buffetted by the sandstorm!
Latias lost 6% of its health.
Latias's leftovers restored its health a little!
Latias restored 6% of its health.

Heatran: 92%
Latias: 75%

Ugh, what a waste. Not all is lost though. Latias has taken Stealth Rock damage on the switch, and her lefties are cancelled by sand. She hasn't slept at all yet, so Gengar should have no problem coming back in and causing trouble. Besides, even if he brings Jirachi back in, it can't take another HP Fire from behind a sub.

Iceman28 switched in Gengar (lvl 100 Gengar ?).
Latias is fast asleep!
The sandstorm rages.
Latias is buffetted by the sandstorm!
Latias lost 6% of its health.
Gengar is buffetted by the sandstorm!
Gengar lost 6% of its health.
Latias's leftovers restored its health a little!
Latias restored 6% of its health.

Gengar: 51%
Latias: 75%

Latias is fast asleep!
Gengar used Substitute.
Gengar lost 25% of its health.
Gengar made a substitute!
The sandstorm rages.
Latias is buffetted by the sandstorm!
Latias lost 6% of its health.
Gengar is buffetted by the sandstorm!
Gengar lost 6% of its health.
Latias's leftovers restored its health a little!
Latias restored 6% of its health.

Gengar: 20%
Latias: 75%

Gengar is poised to strike. Latias has only slept for 2 turns, too, so I might even be able to keep up my sub.

Latias woke up!
Latias used Dragon Pulse.
The substitute took damage for Gengar!
Gengar's substitute faded!
Gengar used Shadow Ball.
It's super effective!
Latias lost 75% of its health.
Syl's Latias fainted.
The sandstorm rages.
Gengar is buffetted by the sandstorm!
Gengar lost 6% of its health.

Gengar: 14%
Latias: 0%

Score: 4-4

Guess not...but Latias is down and out. Scizor can Bullet Punch, but Jirachi's Scarf means its probably coming out again.

Syl switched in Jirachi (lvl 100 Jirachi).
Pointed stones dug into Jirachi.
Jirachi lost 6% of its health.
Jirachi used U-turn.
It's not very effective...
Gengar lost 11% of its health.
Syl switched in Swampert (lvl 100 Swampert ?).
Pointed stones dug into Swampert.
Swampert lost 6% of its health.
Gengar used Shadow Ball.
Swampert lost 37% of its health.
The sandstorm rages.
Gengar is buffetted by the sandstorm!
Gengar lost 2% of its health.
Iceman28's Gengar fainted.
Swampert's leftovers restored its health a little!
Swampert restored 6% of its health.

Gengar: 0%
Jirachi: 31%
Swampert: 69%

Score: 3-4

I prepare to sacrifice Gengar - its done more than enough and if I lock Jirachi into Iron Head, Heatran can come in for free and finish everything with Earth Power. To my surprise, it survives a U-Turn and blasts Swampert with a Shadow Ball right before it dies. Neither Heatran nor Metagross can take Swampert though, so it looks like Zapdos is taking some Ice beams. Because my Zapdos carries Metal Sound, it actually has a fighting chance.

Iceman28 switched in Zapdos (lvl 100 Zapdos).
Zapdos is exerting its pressure!
Zapdos used Metal Sound.
Swampert's special defence was harshly lowered.
Swampert used Ice Beam.
It's super effective!
Zapdos lost 51% of its health.
The sandstorm rages.
Zapdos is buffetted by the sandstorm!
Zapdos lost 6% of its health.
Swampert's leftovers restored its health a little!
Swampert restored 6% of its health.

Zapdos: 43%
Swampert: 75%

I should get well enough after a Roost to finish it with HP Ice on its -2 sp.def.

Zapdos used Roost.
Zapdos restored 50% of its health.
Swampert used Ice Beam.
A critical hit!
Zapdos lost 49% of its health.
The sandstorm rages.
Zapdos is buffetted by the sandstorm!
Zapdos lost 6% of its health.
Swampert's leftovers restored its health a little!
Swampert restored 6% of its health.

Zapdos: 38%
Swampert: 81%

Prediction time. That critical hit puts me right back where I started, so he's probably expecting me to Roost. With an HP Ice, I can hurt him enough to KO next turn and finish up with Metagross.

Zapdos used Hidden Power.
Swampert lost 54% of its health.
Zapdos lost 10% of its health.
Swampert used Earthquake.
It doesn't affect Zapdos...
The sandstorm rages.
Zapdos is buffetted by the sandstorm!
Zapdos lost 6% of its health.
Swampert's leftovers restored its health a little!
Swampert restored 6% of its health.

Zapdos: 22%
Swampert: 33%

Zapdos used Hidden Power.
A critical hit!
Swampert lost 28% of its health.
Syl's Swampert fainted.
Zapdos lost 10% of its health.
The sandstorm rages.
Zapdos is buffetted by the sandstorm!
Zapdos lost 6% of its health.

Zapdos: 6%
Swampert: 0%

Score: 3-3

Great! Zapdos has removed Swampert - which helps Heatran and especially Metagross. Tyranitar is next, I know it, but it won't like a quick Thunderbolt.

Syl switched in Tyranitar (lvl 100 Tyranitar ?).
Tyranitar's Sand Stream whipped up a sandstorm!
Pointed stones dug into Tyranitar.
Tyranitar lost 12% of its health.
Zapdos used Thunderbolt.
Tyranitar lost 39% of its health.
Zapdos lost 5% of its health.
Iceman28's Zapdos fainted.
Tyranitar used Dragon Dance.
Tyranitar's attack was raised.
Tyranitar's speed was raised.
The sandstorm rages.
Tyranitar's leftovers restored its health a little!
Tyranitar restored 6% of its health.

Zapdos: 0%
Tyranitar: 49%

Score: 2-3

Oh no. If Tyranitar is able to KO Meta with Earthquake, then I'm done. I see the leftovers, though, and decide that it could still be mine.

Iceman28 switched in Metagross (lvl 100 Metagross).
Tyranitar used Fire Punch.
It's super effective!
Metagross lost 62% of its health.
Metagross used Agility.
Metagross's speed was sharply raised.
The sandstorm rages.
Tyranitar's leftovers restored its health a little!
Tyranitar restored 6% of its health.

Metagross: 38%
Tyranitar: 55%

I really didn't need to use Agility here, so that was kind of dumb, but it didn't really have any effect on the outcome. Earthquake lets me kill this, Jirachi, and hit Scizor neutral as well.

Metagross used Earthquake.
It's super effective!
Tyranitar lost 55% of its health.
Syl's Tyranitar fainted.
Metagross lost 10% of its health.
The sandstorm rages.

Metagross: 28%
Tyranitar: 0%

Score: 2-2

Syl switched in Jirachi (lvl 100 Jirachi).
Pointed stones dug into Jirachi.
Jirachi lost 6% of its health.
Jirachi used Fire Punch.
It's super effective!
Metagross lost 28% of its health.
Iceman28's Metagross fainted.
The sandstorm rages.

Metagross: 0%
Jirachi: 25%

Score: 1-2

Scarf Fire Punch finishes metagross, but it gives Heatran the ability to wrap this up. Jirachi can only watch helplessly as it and its teammate are roasted in Heatran's flames.

Iceman28 switched in Heatran (lvl 100 Heatran ?).
Syl switched in Scizor (lvl 100 Scizor ?).
Pointed stones dug into Scizor.
Scizor lost 12% of its health.
Heatran used Fire Blast.
It's super effective!
A critical hit!
Scizor lost 88% of its health.
Syl's Scizor fainted.
The sandstorm rages.

Heatran: 92%
Scizor: 0%

Score: 1-1

The switch to Scizor ends in its demise. I didn't get why he did this at first, but then it hit me...flinchhax. Having used Jirachi before, and being quite familiar with Togekiss' infamous flinch victories, I actually consider the possibility of being flinched to death and losing the match.

Syl switched in Jirachi (lvl 100 Jirachi).
Pointed stones dug into Jirachi.
Jirachi lost 6% of its health.
Jirachi used Iron Head.
It's not very effective...
Heatran lost 8% of its health.
Heatran flinched!
The sandstorm rages.

Heatran: 84%
Jirachi: 19%

Flinch 1...

Jirachi used Iron Head.
It's not very effective...
Heatran lost 9% of its health.
Heatran flinched!
The sandstorm rages.

Heatran: 75%
Jirachi: 19%

Flinch 2...

Jirachi used Iron Head.
It's not very effective...
Heatran lost 9% of its health.
Heatran flinched!
The sandstorm rages.

Heatran: 66%
Jirachi: 19%

Flinch 3...

Jirachi used Iron Head.
It's not very effective...
Heatran lost 9% of its health.
Heatran flinched!
The sandstorm rages.

Heatran: 57%
Jirachi: 19%

Flinch 4!? This isn't happening! I can't lose now. Hopefully Heatran will attack (and Fire Blast will hit) next turn.

Jirachi used Iron Head.
It's not very effective...
Heatran lost 9% of its health.
Heatran used Fire Blast.
It's super effective!
Jirachi lost 19% of its health.
Syl's Jirachi fainted.
Iceman28 wins!

Score: 1-0

And that's it! The game is mine, and we each say our gg's.

Props:

-Breloom for taking out basically two pokemon.
-Zapdos for taking on a Swampert.
-Gengar for taking on several pokemon.
-Syl for being a great opponent.
Slops:

-Needlessly using Agility with Metagross.
-Me forgetting about Swampert.
-Constant flinching of Heatran xD.

Well, that's that, tell me what you guys think. Comment on the battle, of course, but let me know how I can improve my writing.​
 

reyscarface

is a Tournament Director Alumnusis a Social Media Contributor Alumnusis a Forum Moderator Alumnusis a Community Contributor Alumnusis a Tiering Contributor Alumnusis a Smogon Media Contributor Alumnusis a Dedicated Tournament Host Alumnusis a defending SPL Championdefeated the Smogon Frontier
World Defender
Decent Warstory.

The only thing i would like to say is that i like warstories more when i dont know the opponent team (adds drama IMO xD).
 
comments were a little lacking but nice try ;D
It made wonder what was going to happen with all those flinches!
 

supermarth64

Here I stand in the light of day
is a Contributor Alumnus
Starting from when you sent Gengar into the sleeping Latias was just narration, although you had that one good though 2 turns after.
 
I would question why you didn't Substitute after Sporing that Rotom-W. That way you had a fairly decent chance of your Substitute still being in-tact after the second Sleep Talk, killed the Rotom, and then could have slept the Latias without taking further damage.

In fact, the play on both sides wasn't great, you have good defensive type coverage, and a few appropriate switches that you could have used to take advantage of a Latias stuck into the wrong move. I don't see why you would risk Breloom's life (even if you did make the initial mistake of not Subbing) to put Latias to sleep, when you have those waiting in the wings to deal with it. It would have helped you out against Swampert too to still have it around =( If you were planning to set up Agiligross, I would have thought you would have wanted to do that later in the game, once you had seen a little more of your opponents team, although on the other hand Rotom-w was probably their main check, you saw that in the end, they had Swampert to deal with it!

Although I enjoyed the warstory up to an extent, it missed out on being great simply because it wasn't that competitive a match. My advice would be that, next time you write a warstory, you should find a match in which you and your opponent played excellently, and one in which you can think back through all your moves, and clearly explain the reasoning behind each one, which you did up to an extent here, but not in much detail. It doesn't hurt to have a thrilling ending either, many of the best warstory writers will admit that finding a good warstoryable battle takes a while! Overall, however, good job =)
 
I would question why you didn't Substitute after Sporing that Rotom-W. That way you had a fairly decent chance of your Substitute still being in-tact after the second Sleep Talk, killed the Rotom, and then could have slept the Latias without taking further damage.

I wasn't running Sub on Breloom, actually.

In fact, the play on both sides wasn't great, you have good defensive type coverage, and a few appropriate switches that you could have used to take advantage of a Latias stuck into the wrong move. I don't see why you would risk Breloom's life (even if you did make the initial mistake of not Subbing) to put Latias to sleep, when you have those waiting in the wings to deal with it. It would have helped you out against Swampert too to still have it around =( If you were planning to set up Agiligross, I would have thought you would have wanted to do that later in the game, once you had seen a little more of your opponents team, although on the other hand Rotom-w was probably their main check, you saw that in the end, they had Swampert to deal with it!

Although I enjoyed the warstory up to an extent, it missed out on being great simply because it wasn't that competitive a match. My advice would be that, next time you write a warstory, you should find a match in which you and your opponent played excellently, and one in which you can think back through all your moves, and clearly explain the reasoning behind each one, which you did up to an extent here, but not in much detail. It doesn't hurt to have a thrilling ending either, many of the best warstory writers will admit that finding a good warstoryable battle takes a while! Overall, however, good job =)
Thanks for the feedback, this was more for me to learn how to write one than anything else.
 

Users Who Are Viewing This Thread (Users: 1, Guests: 0)

Top