Yep, I'm building a team around our fan favorite wallbreaking, high flying, pinsir yanking, bulbasaur sapping super strong dildohorn bug.
Stop denying already, we all know that his horn looks like a dildo.
I recently discovered that this little dude is actually VERY strong. And by that, i mean megacham strong. I'm not talking about strength in stats or stuff like that. The raw strength of this dude actually is pretty underwhelming too. But when he gets going, especially if he gets a pre mega moxie boost or something of that sort, then there ain't no stoppin him.
The Team:
This is the dude I wanted to build my team around. My man, my nigga, my mega dildo horn bug.
I took scarf Landorus-T second to deal with all the popular mons that check/counter my mega dildo horn bug.
Next, I took Defensive Slowbro with T-Wave to primarily check Keldeo and Megagross. Has done a lot more than that though.
Unaware clef counters most (if not all all) of those disgusting special type setup sweepers (physical setup sweepers like lumdd dragonite or bulky dd gyarados are crippled with slowbro and taken care by lando t).
For Stealth Rock user, I decided to pick offensive heatran (with SR + 3 Attacks). This dude is the secondary check to charizard and all its variations.
Scizor is my defogger, defensive pivot, check to clefable/sylveon/other fairy stuff that doesn't carry fire type attacks.
MEGA DILDO (Heracross) (M) @ Heracronite
Ability: Moxie
EVs: 252 Atk / 4 SpD / 252 Spe
Adamant Nature
IVs: 0 SpA
- Rock Blast
- Pin Missile
- Substitute
- Close Combat
My man, my nigga, my mega dildo horn guy, my inspiration. I picked sub + 3 attacks because with a sub on, this dude gets rid of status and his checks suddenly stop checking this dude. Let me list some of the dudes who die to this dude with sub on that otherwise reliably check him:
1- Talonflame
2- Charizard
3- Pinsir
4- Alakazam
5- Infernape
6- Sceptile
7- Medicham
8- Gallade
9- Rotom-W (Does kill rotom-w regardless, doesn't get burned in the process if sub is out)
10- Regular Slowbro (with sub out, kills slowbro without getting t-waved)
I use adamant on him because he outspeeds what he needs to outspeed anyway and he gets outsped anyway by faster enemies, so why not just deal more damage.
BIG PIMPIN (Landorus-Therian) @ Choice Scarf
Ability: Intimidate
EVs: 252 Atk / 4 SpD / 252 Spe
Adamant Nature
IVs: 0 SpA
- Earthquake
- Stone Edge
- Superpower
- U-turn
This dude rocks. Literally. Takes out huge amount of threats before they can even be a threat to my mega dildo. This guy pulls the weight of my team sometimes, getting 2-3 crucial kills to pave the way for any other mon (or sometimes himself). Picking off paralyzed threats (by my Slowbro) very effectively, this dude kills what mega heracross kills with sub straight on (excluding rotom and slowbro of course).
Despite being Adamant, he reaches 421 speed with scarf, which is enough to outspeed base 135s and OHKO mega manectric with EQ (even at -1). I don't need him to outspeed and kill mega kazam, that's other people's job. Like the scizor.
PINK AND GRAY DICKS (Slowbro) (M) @ Leftovers
Ability: Regenerator
EVs: 252 HP / 232 Def / 24 SpD
Bold Nature
IVs: 0 Atk
- Scald
- Slack Off
- Thunder Wave
- Psyshock
May I have your attention please? For one second? Ok. This dude is my status spreader and his status spreads faster than STDs in an orgy. Not only this dude checks keldeo and megagross (without grass knot) VERY effectively (and I mean VERY effectively), but also there are very few set up sweepers that this dude can't cripple into oblivion. He hurts my offensive momentum, yes, but he kills my opponent's offensive momentum in return, and that's what I am looking for. I don't know what this exact spread makes him live, but he actually lived what I wanted him to live so...
GIGOLO (Clefable) (M) @ Leftovers
Ability: Unaware
EVs: 248 HP / 252 Def / 8 SpD
Bold Nature
IVs: 0 Atk
- Calm Mind
- Moonblast
- Wish
- Protect
My mega sableye check, volcarona check, blah blah blah. I am having wish variant over flamethrower moonlight variant because wish passing sometimes becomes really awesome. I have a heatran to kill opposing scizors, heatrans and ferrothorns anyway. I don't know what exact benchmarks this spread reaches though, I just took it because it was on smogon pokedex.
DICK HOLDER (Scizor) (M) @ Leftovers
Ability: Technician
EVs: 248 HP / 72 Def / 188 SpD
Careful Nature
IVs: 0 SpA
- U-turn
- Bullet Punch
- Defog
- Roost
My defogger, my defensive pivot, the dude who bops hoopas like nothing else. Despite the fact that this mon deals a whole lot less damage than I would like him to (sometimes I feel that this dude deals zero damage, literally), he just defogs so reliably that I don't want to cut him for something else (it would be good if he dealt more than zero damage though). Spread makes sure he comes into mega alakazam, eats 2 hits like a champ and kills with u-turn.
BRICK SHITTER (Heatran) (M) @ Air Balloon
Ability: Flash Fire
EVs: 4 Def / 252 SpA / 252 Spe
Timid Nature
- Fire Blast
- Earth Power
- Stone Edge
- Stealth Rock
This dude man, this dude. I just love how hard he hits while being so bulky at the same fucking time. Stone Edge for Talonflame, Earth Power is for... well, because it's Earth Power and Fire Blast because I want to hit as hard as humanly possible. This dude is also my rock setter. When you gather up all this stuff, he also kills opposing heatrans for me. I thought of creeping base 70s and investing the remainder on Def (or HP), but then decided that killing opposing heatrans is more important and there are too many heatrans that are only at 263 speed so I'm keeping this dude at max speed.
Replays
While I was writing this, showdown temporarily disabled replays due to a DDOS attack or some shit like that. When replays reopen, I'm going to put up a sizable amount here.
Changes
This right here is the v1.0 of this team. I'm currently considering to replace the slowbro-scizor duo with mew+something and that something needs to be bulky and have access to heavy hitting priority (no breloom though, I don't want more 4x flying weakness).
Threats
1- Landorus-Gliscor-Hippowdon-Garchomp: When I have these dudes on the enemy team, I try to play around them by trying to wear them down gradually before scoring the kill at 50-60% range.
2- Scizor-Ferrothorn with proper support: Proper support includes something that chases away my heatran. I hate when this happens because it makes me go and try to outsustain the amount of switches and the entry hazards (because my team is so fucking bulky and full of recovery and shit, I generally DO outsustain my opponent though).
3- Rain: Let's face one fact, this team deals with rain VERY poorly as my slowbro lacks grass knot (which is a HUGE handicap when the enemy rain team is a mega swampert variant) and I lack electric type moves in my team (bar that t-wave on the slowbro). Rain teams are also things that I need to outsustain. If the rain team in question lacks mega swampert, it is a whole lot easier to deal with as I cam spam t-wave all day long and those swift swim users have a speed tie against my slowbro. Kingdra? My clefable looks at his face and sets up calm minds. Kabutops? Slowbro t-waves him. Slowbro can also stay on mega swampert and use scald until he burns but that's not the most effective way to deal with him, is that.
While I was writing this, showdown temporarily disabled replays due to a DDOS attack or some shit like that. When replays reopen, I'm going to put up a sizable amount here.
Changes
This right here is the v1.0 of this team. I'm currently considering to replace the slowbro-scizor duo with mew+something and that something needs to be bulky and have access to heavy hitting priority (no breloom though, I don't want more 4x flying weakness).
Threats
1- Landorus-Gliscor-Hippowdon-Garchomp: When I have these dudes on the enemy team, I try to play around them by trying to wear them down gradually before scoring the kill at 50-60% range.
2- Scizor-Ferrothorn with proper support: Proper support includes something that chases away my heatran. I hate when this happens because it makes me go and try to outsustain the amount of switches and the entry hazards (because my team is so fucking bulky and full of recovery and shit, I generally DO outsustain my opponent though).
3- Rain: Let's face one fact, this team deals with rain VERY poorly as my slowbro lacks grass knot (which is a HUGE handicap when the enemy rain team is a mega swampert variant) and I lack electric type moves in my team (bar that t-wave on the slowbro). Rain teams are also things that I need to outsustain. If the rain team in question lacks mega swampert, it is a whole lot easier to deal with as I cam spam t-wave all day long and those swift swim users have a speed tie against my slowbro. Kingdra? My clefable looks at his face and sets up calm minds. Kabutops? Slowbro t-waves him. Slowbro can also stay on mega swampert and use scald until he burns but that's not the most effective way to deal with him, is that.
MEGA DILDO (Heracross) (M) @ Heracronite
Ability: Moxie
EVs: 252 Atk / 4 SpD / 252 Spe
Adamant Nature
IVs: 0 SpA
- Rock Blast
- Pin Missile
- Substitute
- Close Combat
PINK AND GRAY DICKS (Slowbro) (M) @ Leftovers
Ability: Regenerator
EVs: 252 HP / 232 Def / 24 SpD
Bold Nature
IVs: 0 Atk
- Scald
- Slack Off
- Thunder Wave
- Psyshock
GIGOLO (Clefable) (M) @ Leftovers
Ability: Unaware
EVs: 248 HP / 252 Def / 8 SpD
Bold Nature
IVs: 0 Atk
- Calm Mind
- Moonblast
- Wish
- Protect
DICK HOLDER (Scizor) (M) @ Leftovers
Ability: Technician
EVs: 248 HP / 72 Def / 188 SpD
Careful Nature
IVs: 0 SpA
- U-turn
- Bullet Punch
- Defog
- Roost
BIG PIMPIN (Landorus-Therian) @ Choice Scarf
Ability: Intimidate
EVs: 252 Atk / 4 SpD / 252 Spe
Adamant Nature
IVs: 0 SpA
- Earthquake
- Stone Edge
- Superpower
- U-turn
BRICK SHITTER (Heatran) (M) @ Air Balloon
Ability: Flash Fire
EVs: 4 Def / 252 SpA / 252 Spe
Timid Nature
- Fire Blast
- Earth Power
- Stone Edge
- Stealth Rock
Ability: Moxie
EVs: 252 Atk / 4 SpD / 252 Spe
Adamant Nature
IVs: 0 SpA
- Rock Blast
- Pin Missile
- Substitute
- Close Combat
PINK AND GRAY DICKS (Slowbro) (M) @ Leftovers
Ability: Regenerator
EVs: 252 HP / 232 Def / 24 SpD
Bold Nature
IVs: 0 Atk
- Scald
- Slack Off
- Thunder Wave
- Psyshock
GIGOLO (Clefable) (M) @ Leftovers
Ability: Unaware
EVs: 248 HP / 252 Def / 8 SpD
Bold Nature
IVs: 0 Atk
- Calm Mind
- Moonblast
- Wish
- Protect
DICK HOLDER (Scizor) (M) @ Leftovers
Ability: Technician
EVs: 248 HP / 72 Def / 188 SpD
Careful Nature
IVs: 0 SpA
- U-turn
- Bullet Punch
- Defog
- Roost
BIG PIMPIN (Landorus-Therian) @ Choice Scarf
Ability: Intimidate
EVs: 252 Atk / 4 SpD / 252 Spe
Adamant Nature
IVs: 0 SpA
- Earthquake
- Stone Edge
- Superpower
- U-turn
BRICK SHITTER (Heatran) (M) @ Air Balloon
Ability: Flash Fire
EVs: 4 Def / 252 SpA / 252 Spe
Timid Nature
- Fire Blast
- Earth Power
- Stone Edge
- Stealth Rock
