Many members of Pokemon Showdown want high ranks in the community without any effort put in at all. I plan to write an article about how to achieve this goal through writing articles. Of course, most of the pre-pubescent boys on the site have never had an original thought in their twelve-year-old lives, and are completely incapable of writing a sentence, much less an entire article.
That's where I come in. I will write an article all about, for lack of a better word, bullshitting their way through the community. More of an opinion/satire piece than a step-by-step list really, but the nature of the article should resemble that of an article written by the morons over at wikiHow.
You see, I am a huge fan of snide, ironic humour. As well as an avid Pokemon fan. These two things combined added to my oft-overused pop culture references, I can almost convince people that I'm a good writer.
Now, you may be wondering, "why should I let this guy write for us? He's belittling our community, trashing our webzine concept, and operating under the assumption that Pokemon Showdown is filled with twelve-year-olds."
This is completely true. That's what makes me a unique and worthwhile writer. I am not afraid of high-concept, self-referential articles. Like the Community (TV show, of course) of Pokemon Showdown writers. And I can go meta. Oh, so very meta (if you don't believe me, reread this submission).
Before I end my submission, I'll leave off by offering you a thought. Ask yourselves 'what does this guy bring to the table?'. The answer is this: the ability to mask real issues through satire. I know this ability is not what you would expect in The Player, but I promise you, I can make your webzine one worth reading.
That's where I come in. I will write an article all about, for lack of a better word, bullshitting their way through the community. More of an opinion/satire piece than a step-by-step list really, but the nature of the article should resemble that of an article written by the morons over at wikiHow.
You see, I am a huge fan of snide, ironic humour. As well as an avid Pokemon fan. These two things combined added to my oft-overused pop culture references, I can almost convince people that I'm a good writer.
Now, you may be wondering, "why should I let this guy write for us? He's belittling our community, trashing our webzine concept, and operating under the assumption that Pokemon Showdown is filled with twelve-year-olds."
This is completely true. That's what makes me a unique and worthwhile writer. I am not afraid of high-concept, self-referential articles. Like the Community (TV show, of course) of Pokemon Showdown writers. And I can go meta. Oh, so very meta (if you don't believe me, reread this submission).
Before I end my submission, I'll leave off by offering you a thought. Ask yourselves 'what does this guy bring to the table?'. The answer is this: the ability to mask real issues through satire. I know this ability is not what you would expect in The Player, but I promise you, I can make your webzine one worth reading.
