1) X-Act
2) Elevator Music
X-Act's spread is so close to what I had in mind that, as soon as I saw his idea, I just decided not to make a spread and instead support his. The key here is maintaining a good bulkyness while having a low HP, so 252 EVs are free to put in the offensive stats. What X-Act said in his reasoning, really.
Elevator Music's is like a """watered down""" version of X-Act's, with more speed. Of course it's unique in its own way but I feel that it is halfway between the low HP and high HP spreads, not daring to go either way. But regardless of that, it IS a good spread, and easier to EV than most, so it goes rightfully second in my list.