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My immune system sucks and thus randomly have hard time properly digesting any food (doesn't happen as often as it used to anymore, mostly because it would happen when I had an excess of liquified dairy products like ice cream and milkshakes, which i barely ever eat/drink anymore)
I also have pretty severe anxiety and have found myself more recently going into anxiety attacks, where I start to consider suicide at points and just think way too deeply about something minor. They don't last too long, but I'm considering seeing a counselor when I start college this year.
I also have pretty severe anxiety and have found myself more recently going into anxiety attacks, where I start to consider suicide at points and just think way too deeply about something minor. They don't last too long, but I'm considering seeing a counselor when I start college this year.
I've been diagnosed with generalised anxiety disorder only recently but suffered with it for a good portion of my life, and finally listening to my now ex-girlfriend and parents... I saw doctor which recommended me to counselling as part of a way to help me deal with it. I started seeing a counsellor early this year and has definitely made a huge difference regarding my attitude towards life, myself and others, my ability to focus at uni and gradually raising confidence and assurance levels. Going into initial appoinments feeling wound up, paranoid, high heartbeat and a tight chest, then leaving feeling great after a session with increased motivation and and a much more relaxed state of mind and body, alongside learning more techniques to manage anxiety and thought processes to make sense of my irrational feelings has been amazing so far. So i definitely recommend it!
I have a scar on my forehead that is literally like Harry Potter's because once as a kid my fat aunt scared me so fucking hard by jumping out of a doorway I screamed and ran face first into the corner of a door which ripped my forehead open.
It was the only time I'd ever passed out in my life and the whole thing was pretty cinematic, with the periodic slips of conciousness that happened (in the car, emergency room). Finally woke up the next morning and had no clue what had transpired. I went to brush my teeth (I was already back home after beig stitched up) and I saw the jagged stitching and went "COOL IM HARRY POTTER".
Nothing serious:
-over weight
-seasonal allergies
-learning disability for language
-I can't rotate my left wrist so that the back of by hand is away from me
I was diagnosed with mild autism when I was like 6, but I haven't been tested since and it hasn't really had an effect on my life at all after leaving primary school. To be fair I did some pretty weird things as a child (kissing teachers, isolating myself from other primary schoolers, performing Greased Lightning at a talent show), but it never caused any negative reprocussions in early secondary school since I made friends with this guy who was like 5'8" and the same age as me. :p
Oh, and my right foot cramps like crazy if I keep my toes curled up for too long. wooooooo
My medical history is hypochrondriac/Münchausen's porn, hope you enjoy @Pernicious. Anyway, upon being alerted this thread is a real thing, I feel obliged to post because this is the one race I have a stake in (kidding, sorta, I just find my own situation really funny). I'm constantly ill and catch everything that comes around; I tend to get pretty sick from it too, but I usually avoid hospitalisation so I can't complain about that too much!! I caught pertussis/whooping cough twice and I was recently vaccinated both times, for example (the second time I was in hospital with a brain tumour and there was an epidemic, so it's understandable). I'm also disabled and have a number of disorders and chronic illnesses.
Here is the bullet point list of major diagnoses, in chronological order (kinda), but I'm omitting a few things (that people who have known me for a long time might notice) because I don't want to talk about them right now so it's not fully inclusive:
Strabismic amblyopia in my left eye (lazy eye, it's severely impaired and I can't see out of it, resulting in poor depth perception and poor peripheral vision), my right eye is impaired as well so my vision is super bad but my right eye is mostly corrected with glasses, which gets rid of the blurriness
Asthma, it's not that bad anymore but it used to be pretty bad when I was young and it flared up again more recently due to my respiratory troubles post-brain surgery
Dyspraxia, this took years to diagnose but basically my proprioception and balance are extremely poor, as are my fine and gross motor skills
Clinical depression / various anxiety disorders including OCD, pretty much plagued my pre/adolescence but I'm coping a lot better now and other than a few depressive relapses I've been very happy for years (I'm also off my antidepressants, which I took for ~5 years out of the 7 I was majorly depressed)
Iron deficiency anaemia + recurrent vitamin B12/D deficiencies
Benign brain tumour #1 (an objectively huge unilateral acoustic neuroma that nearly killed me via brain stem compression and took all the hearing and most of my vestibular function from the right side, leaving me with tinnitus as well)
Epilepsy (absence seizures with myoclonic jerks, mostly triggered by sleep deprivation / stress but sometimes flashing lights)
Benign brain tumour #2 (a meningioma in my skull base, apparently causes chronic pain and focal neurologic weakness in my left hand; I can't use my left hand sometimes due to the loose grip... it's unfortunately very close to important structures, so it'll be a tricky operation if/when it grows)
Raynaud's disease (lol this is mostly harmless because I have it very mildly fortunately, but I have to be careful about the cold anyway... I just included it because I had so many ultrasounds and random tests done to diagnose this shit)
Epiretinal membrane on my left eye (asymptomatic but needs monitoring, it's mainly interesting because it's associated with a genetic disorder I'm about to undergo testing/counselling for)
I have some other problems that don't have an associated diagnosis, so I omitted those as well.
So we're still working on figuring out the full extent of what causes my problems, and that means I get new diagnoses fairly often, and have to have a lot of tests (both to investigate and to monitor ongoing conditions). MRIs, ultrasounds, CTs, x-rays, blood tests, EEGs, ECGs, various other imaging... recently I had a nuclear oesophageal swallow scan, that was gross~ I see a lot of specialists, and I'm constantly seeing doctors (if it's not because I'm sick, it's because I'm getting tested to see if I'm gonna get sick, lol). The main specialists I see (other than the dentist...) are a neurologist, a neurosurgeon, an ophthalmologist, and an an otolaryngologist, but I've seen many others over the years for my conditions.
I'm very young to have these kinds of tumours and so right now I'm undergoing genetic testing for a rare (numbers vary, incidence I most commonly see cited is 1 in 33,000 with prevalences of <1 in 60,000) genetic disorder called neurofibromatosis type 2. I haven't talked about that much anywhere, but I figure this is an appropriate place as any. Anyway, simple version: NF2 is caused by a messed up tumour suppressant gene, so you end up growing tumours. Ultimately patients with NF2 develop numerous cranial and sometimes spinal/skin tumours and/or cataracts. Usually bilateral acoustic neuromas, which are the hallmark of the disease and its main diagnostic criteria. I'm a high-risk patient so I have to get tested to see if we can locate a mutation (it might not show up if I have it though due to test sensitivity/mosaicism issues).
Also, my walking frame:
I love this thing. It goes so smoothly and helps me stay steady; I feel so safe when I push it. People stare at me for being young and using a walking frame, but I don't really care because I was invisibly disabled for most of my life and people were shitty then too. If I'm out and about with that frame, I'm using the frame to keep myself safe; I have no problem with being disabled, and I just want to get on with my life. In fact, I am actually kinda proud of my frame in a way; it's a visible symbol of my experiences with tumours and how they changed me. But mostly it just helps me get around and that's what matters.
I usually just laugh things off unless I'm really suffering, and irl I'm very afraid of making a big deal out of these kinds of things; it took my mother three weeks to get me up to the hospital when I was dying of a brain tumour because I refused to go to the ER for a non-emergency (the doctor didn't help) before. Actually, my hospital aversion probably borders on the irrational, but I hate my local hospital (I'm sure it's mutual...).
I have an outlook I would deem neither positive or negative; I like to think it's very matter-of-fact, because some of the things I've had to deal with in the last few years are very... confronting. I have an abstract intellectual interest in some of this stuff and enjoy reading scientific literature/anything else I can find relating to it, and that makes it fairly easy for me to digest otherwise frightening new facts. Even though I'm not unrealistically hopeful about some things (like my mom copes with her anxiety by telling herself/praying that my tumour's gonna shrink when my neurosurgeon is almost certain surgery will be necessary eventually), I try to appreciate each day, to look for things to be grateful for, for things that make me happy, and to believe in the better outcome if it's available. As such I stay quite calm and rarely get despondent about my sickness. I also try to have a sense of perspective, because having read a lot of case reviews and stuff, I know I really could be a lot worse off! And I'm happy and not suffering (now I'm on a painkiller) and planning on going back to university, so, hey, I'm doing well!
Thanks for readin (if you bothered lol it's so long). Thanks to everyone else who posted their stories/information too. I like getting to know everyone. :D
Aww. :( As someone else with severe anxiety problems, I'm giving you my full sympathy. I think it would be positive for you to get help (although I'm just a stranger). If you build up rapport with your counsellor, it can be great. I learned some useful management techniques from my therapist, same as Enguarde, and while my mother unfortunately made the sessions suck half the time, I enjoyed the catharsis from the times I did get to talk to her alone. Hopefully things work out for you either way.
ETA2:
because it implied the solicitation of a beautiful and detailed jumpluff post wherein the facts contained would be shamefully to be held to a standard of necessary on-topic reiteration
Haha, I didn't notice this line before I posted. Now I feel bad about deleting my long rambling sections about how my conditions impact my life and how I manage them! But they were really long and uninteresting so the thread is better off. :P I'm actually quite good at keeping my academic writing concise / finding shit to delete. I just have a case of the Theorymon writing blues (i.e. I talk way too much).
^You are a very strong person. I remember you talking about this in PS! and I remember being very sad after hearing all that.
I'd rather not talk about this shit with anonymous people online but fuck it. I have a (very distant) cousin who committed suicide after the doctors told him that he would never be able to lead a normal life after he had a bad case of brain tumor coupled with a bunch of ridiculous complications that left him half paralyzed, on constant artificial support and a cruel course of medications that would leave him sickly and weak almost all the time.
It was back then I wondered maybe he was right in throwing his life away, because living a life like this was worse than dying (imo)
But then I come across people like you who are fighting and living on, and even managing to be optimistic about all this. Really changes my perception about matters like this.
I applaud everyone who come forward and shared today. I find it pretty awesome that you come here day in and day out laughing, having fun with competitive pokemon and never give a hint to anyone that there is so much wrong with your lives and you are still enduring.
yeah dude my left big toe has been ingrown for like 3 years. i've had surgery on it twice and it just came back which sucks, planning to get the whole nail removed at some point just so it will go away. it pretty much meant i couldn't do sports for the past 3 years, which meant that i put on a lot of weight and didn't get out much. also had sporadic periods of depression for the past 2 years which was pretty bad but w/e
also sometimes i have problems with dizziness and nausea when i stand up too quick, to the point where i just lose balance and collapse. it's only happened a small number of times, but on one occasion i fell down a flight of stairs as a result, which does hurt quite a bit lol
Nothing that serious, but I have an abnormally high metabolism rate and so my BMI (which isn't the best measurement, but I'll use it as an example) can swoop as low as 14. (14 being "very severely underweight"). I eat tons yet I never seem to put on weight; I'm like a stick figure. People have even asked me if I'm anorexic...
I was born 9 and a half weeks early which probably explains why I am not as developed as some of the other guys of my age. I weighed 3 pounds, and you could fit me into the palm of your hand xD
yeah dude my left big toe has been ingrown for like 3 years. i've had surgery on it twice and it just came back which sucks, planning to get the whole nail removed at some point just so it will go away. it pretty much meant i couldn't do sports for the past 3 years, which meant that i put on a lot of weight and didn't get out much. also had sporadic periods of depression for the past 2 years which was pretty bad but w/e
also sometimes i have problems with dizziness and nausea when i stand up too quick, to the point where i just lose balance and collapse. it's only happened a small number of times, but on one occasion i fell down a flight of stairs as a result, which does hurt quite a bit lol
also your dizziness problem sounds like syncope. are you tall by any chance, because it's pretty common in taller people. i had it, still do i guess, but its gotten a lot better over time. its still a bitch though when you dont expect it and then you feel it coming on. i've never fainted though. it still might be a good idea to look into it.
Aspergers and anxiety here. Both affect my life in a significant way, and often combine together to really screw me over. My anxiety is a near constant thing that went unnoticed for so long because I was so used to being in a state of tension. Its impossible for me to passively relax (and if I try and make myself relax the twitching kicks in), and because of that I'm always subconsconciously doing something with myself to ease that- pulling out leg/beard hairs, chewing and twiddling my head hair, intertwining my fingers, chewing the inside of my cheeks, leg shaking, tensing up my abs or my jaw, rocking, writhing, and if it gets really severe, my arms start flapping (and at this point I don't know what I'm doing). Once, I passed out from sheer fear when I merely cut my thumb.
The aspergers is something I can kind of deal with when given time to think. The main way it hampers me is direct social contact, at which I'm completely and utterly inept at. I have severe difficulty expressing my emotions correctly and I find people impossible to understand for the most part unless I take a good minute or so to search my brain and dredge up possible reasons for their actions based on what I've seen people do before. Also, I have several irrational traits I need to iron out (the only person who can tell me I'm wrong is me, for example)
That said, aspergers has given me many things about myself I value. For one, its given me my own way of looking at things thats comparitively objective (and ultimately more useful) than the average person. Also, my natural aversion to most people has actually benefitted me in the sense that I always steered clear of the wrong people both as a child and now- I don't at all regret the fact that I have few friends because every single one of them is worth my time and effort, and I'm 100% confident none of them will ever knowingly let me down. Lastly, I inherently enjoy learning and thinking. I'm actually quite capable of spending hours lost in my head, just thinking, independant of what time it is. Most of it is philosophical.
As far as non-mental issues go, I suffer from incredible headrushes. Passed out on too many occasions to count from merely standing up. I also have very shaky hands for some reason. Nothing serious though.
i was born with a birth defect which later developed into a hernia when i was about 7. that's the worst case i've ever suffered through that put me in the hospital - otherwise i had my bouts of flu and chicken pox like most young children.
presently, i'm pretty healthy. i'm mildly allergic to pet dander, and my vision is like 20/80 and 20/75 or something so kind of bad, but not terrible.
jumpluff remains my fragile little princess <3
the only thing that really plagues me is my skin. it's very, very sensitive - i've always had rough bumpy arms that are kind of always dry, but even so i don't excessively use lotion to balance myself out. i'm a ginger, so i guess it comes with the territory anyway.
i guess something else that is annoying but also self-induced is that i'm usually covered in little bruises/cuts, some cuts which turn into scars. i'm really careless a lot and have poor kinesthetics, mostly due to my stubborn nature and thinking myself impervious no matter how much evidence i earn that proves otherwise.
I am perfectly healthy, mostly, apart from the terrible constipation I've been having for years. I always got these terrible aches in my back, and thought it was pain associated with me growing due to puberty. Turns out that I'm literally full of crap - X-rays revealed my entire lower bowels are filled with poop, which puts pressure on a nerve cluster in my lower back. So right now I'm being treated with huge amounts of laxatives, hoping that that will eventually flush the whole thing through.
Apart from that, I was rather weak as a baby, but that worked itself out as I grew older. I've also had problems with my teeth lacking proper protection, but that's also solved by now. I've had my appendix removed, but that doesn't really count as an ailment, I guess. I also used to have pretty terrible acne, but that got treated as well. So, for the most part, I'm just stuck with a few meters of poop inside of me. Could be much worse.
Edit: oh wait, forgot to make an obligatory joke:
I've got a fever, and the only prescription's more cowbell!
Reading this thread, I feel pretty damn lucky - the worst I have is seasonal allergies and mild insomnia (which is pretty frustrating at times but eh). I'm also really clumsy and absentminded but I don't think that counts unless it turns out I have some sort of disorder causing it (hopefully not!)
Anxiety. It only bothers me for one secret reason (I find it quite pathetic), and the fire alarms in school. I love the winter and rainy days in school, the school doesn't want the floors wet in a fire drill when we evacuate. I hate incredibly obnoxious and loud sounds that are sudden (Dubstep lol). I used to have eczema on my elbows, now I have it on my eye, and I can't see very well possibly because of that. I only have anxiety attacks when that secret circumstance happens. It's really not that bad, I just hope to get on the school sports team, because they miss a day of school that's on the day of a fire drill, I hopefully will get high jump, last year, I placed second in high jump, but the person who won was a fluke! I also have allergies, it's really annoying, but not too bad, just take benadryl! But, the allergy that annoys me SOOOO much is my mango allergy, I get hives, and my lips swells up. It annoys so much because mango used to be my favourite fruit! Not sure if you can say its a ailment, but I think it gets in my grades, I am actually a pretty cynical guy, my teacher lowers my mark for cynicsm. It really isn't bad, it just annoys me. But, anxiety is shit, but I feel lucky because its not as bad as a lot of people.
On the mental side I have pretty textbook ADD, and it's affected me in my school, work, and social sides of life. Getting better at coping and adapting, though.
On the physical side I have a ton of nagging and chronic injuries in my knees and ankles as a result of all the abuse my body has taken through my years of being an athlete. If I can say anything to the younger generation, it's to take good care of your body when you're young. If you injure yourself, give it plenty of time to heal. Being 78 years old and arthritic is not particularly fun.
I feel too guilty posting in this thread now, seeing as what some of you have to /had to go through is horrific. I have had surgery 5 times, but that was all before the age of 14, so it's not too fresh in my mind thank god.
At the moment I'm dealing with a pretty bad back though and I have no idea what it is. I tweaked it driving to the hoop a few months ago, so I just took it easy on my lower back at the gym (no deadlifts for example) and waited till it ceased. About a week ago I started getting pains in my upper back and a few days ago, I almost fell in the shower because my whole back ceased up. I'm playing sport and ignoring the pain, but before my basketball game today I had trouble moving in warmups. I applied a shit load of nurofen gel to it and got through the game, but I'm gonna go to the physio next week and get whatever the fuck it is sorted out. Gridiron preseason starts next week and I HATE missing sports for physical reasons, so I'm gonna get it done before contact sessions start for sure!
EDIT: I too was a weak baby and used to have something known as low muscle tone, but apparently I've grown out of it now because I don't have much of a problem with sports!
Yeah, no sane person is going to look down on you for having an "inferior" ailment or something, thats dumb as hell. One of the smartest things you can do as a person is acknowledge your weaknesses, even the physical ones, and too many people don't.
