Magnet Rise is a
Steel Steel-type move that grants it a Ground immunity to Ground-types and that it allows allow it to surprise and setup set up on slower Ground-type staples that use Ground-type moves to beat Steel (fluff) like Donphan, Metagross, Nidoquen Nidoqueen, (AC) and Rhyperior.
a few things to point out:
- everyone knows that Magnet Rise is a Steel-type move, cutting that part would definitely help a bit -> "Magnet Rise grants..."
- you added an extra information, Ground-type, which is unfortunately incorrect, as Metagross is also mentioned in the list and is obviously a Steel-type, just be careful when adding subjective stuff, it can definitely change more than you can think!
Other common setup fodder
includes include Florges, Cresselia without Thunderwave Thunder Wave in its moveselot (fluff), and Choice-attackers Choice Spec users (I assume you're referring to Choice Spec users, if not then substitute with Choice Scarf/Band/item users) like Gardevoir, Goodra, and Noivern.
- the object being listed is plural, so fodders
should be used.
- again, another slightly incorrect personal change, the author isn't necessarily implying that all these use Choice Specs, they could also be using Choice Scarf. The term Choice attacker(s) is perfectly accepted
, all you needed to do was remove the hyphen.
except Noivern and its typing
grants resistance grant it resistances to common priorities priority moves like First Impression and Ice Shard
- these two sentences need to be separated, the subject (and subsequently the theme) changes, so a comma before "and" should be used because "and" is introducing a new clause.
- typing is singular, so you'd need to use 3rd pers. sing. of the verb -> grants
so it’s incredibly difficult to offensively check after setting up
forgot to point this out so I'm gonna also tag tenzhii
, but this (’) is a curly apostrophe and should be changed to the regular one ('), these are unfortunately very easy to miss :(
Frailer teams are often unable to handle Klinklang's
Steel / Electric Steel- and Electric-type coverage during the duration of (fluff) the late-game as it is only resisted by Electric- types and Water+Ground typings Water / Ground-types
- Steel + Electric coverage is the correct way to spell this
- Whenever any of the 3 phases of the battle is mentioned (early- / mid- / late-game), there's no need to use anything before, like "in the", "during the" & whatnot. "X Pokemon can sweep late-game
" ; "Y Pokemon can set Spikes early-game
" and so on.
- last part is correct!
Balanced teams without such Pokemon resistances can be in trouble struggle against Klinklang too. (fluff; this is implied by the previous sentence even though it specifies frailer teams and doesn't add much to the analysis)
I'll directly post the same note I left to Tenzhii -> I don't necessarily agree with this, what the author's basically saying here is "even balanced teams, which tend to be bulkier and more prepared to handle Klinklang, can be in trouble too without such Pokemon", it's pretty clear to me and when making GP checks it's always safe to ask the author or a QC member first before making such important changes!
Xatu is fantastic in pivoting into passive opponents like defensive Flygon, Vaporeon, (AC) and Talonflame that
relies rely on statuses status effects to inflict significant damage, (AC) and is a true nuisance for entry hazard setters (if possible, try and clarify what type of entry hazard setters: Stealth Rocks, Spikes or Toxic Spikes?) too, including like Copperjah, Mudsdale and Bronzong.
- opponent = opposing player, what you're looking for here is foes
, which refers to opposing Pokemon.
- I agree with separating the two sentences even though it's not required, but if you choose to do so you're gonna have to add a subject, otherwise it can't make sense, try reading it on its own, an independent sentence starting with "and is a true nuisance...", who is?
- entry hazard setters is a frequently used umbrella term that doesn't need to be that
specific, it's perfectly fine.
Additionally, with Teleport Xatu can guarantee safe entry for both potent breakers (wallbreakers or stallbreakers?) and
s etuppers set up sweepers
- A comma is needed after Teleport.
- good catch on the "breakers" and great job at not changing it yourself, it's always safe to ask a QC member or the author first to make sure that what you're assuming is correct.
as such making it
the a staple dual screens setter on HO teams and sets setting it apart from other users of Light Screen and Reflect, (RC) dual screen setters like Espeon.
"as such" is completely out of place here; it is used as an introductory adverb for an independent clause, is always preceded by either a semicolon or a period, and is not a substitute for "therefore".
"Xatu can't switch into Dark-types like Grimmsnarl; therefore
, partners like Hawlucha..."
"Xatu is a really frail Pokemon; as such
, partners like Hawlucha..."
This is me doing my best to try to explain the difference between these two, it's not that easy so if you're still confused DM me on Discord lol
the likes of (fluff) Sirfetch’d and Machamp
- "the likes of" shouldn't be removed, otherwise you're implying that the only two Pokemon that Xatu struggles to switch into are these two, and that is not correct, the author's simply giving two examples.
- Another curly apostrophe here ;-)
,(AC) forcing it to Roost
very frequently to stay healthy throughout the duration of (fluff) the battle.
Correct, but we never use moves as verbs, they should always be preceded by something like "use" or "fire off" in the case of more powerful moves
Xatu also struggles heavily
to prevent in preventing Diancie to set from setting Stealth Rocks
- "to struggle with
", that's the correct preposition
- Stealth Rock
, not Rocks
solid defensive type and
use of Slack Off
serial commas, watch out for these, a comma is needed before "and"!
It can consistently switch into threats like Astrolotl, Zapdos, and Rilaboom, and make use of its impressive coverage to punish
almost any (fluff) possible switch switch-ins
- again, same thing, if you want to keep the two sentences separated by a comma, you're gonna have to reiterate the subject in the second one, otherwise it won't make sense. Alternatively, removing the comma would also be perfectly fine here!
- "almost any" isn't really fluff, this part of the analysis is meant to showcase the Pokemon's traits, and the author's emphasizing the fact that its coverage can punish a lot of switch-ins, these are very small changes that may seem to be irrelevant but that actually have a significant impact.
Unfortunately, (RC) it can be very hard
justifying to justify the use of Cyclohm over Zapdos, which offers a crucial Ground-type immunity and comparable offensive pressure.
- A comma is indeed needed after "Unfortunately"!
- No need to add "-type" when talking about immunities, Ground immunity
is perfectly accepted.
capitalise capitalize of off
- important thing: when making changes, make sure you follow a specific order. Remove everything first, and then add your corrections (and potential comments if you need to justify your changes). In addition, the correct preposition here is "on", so it would be capitalise of capitalize on
heal up with Slack Off and Recover respectively
A comma is needed before respectively!
Heavy-Duty Boots let Cyclohm safely pivot
inside onto the field even with several entry hazards over on the field
there's no need to specify the direction of the pivoting, it can be in and out of the field, and the verb can stand on its own without an object
but alternatively Rocky Helmet
synergise very well synergizes well with Cyclohm's ability: (remove colon) Static to punish U-Turn users like Tornadus-T and Rillaboom.
- "but" and "alternatively" are pretty much the same thing and sound incredibly redundant when put together. Remember that if you choose to use "alternatively", you're gonna have to add either a semicolon or a colon before it.
- it's U-turn, not U-Turn.