Category 9: Video Killed the Radio Star
Header:
The Buggles - Video Killed the Radio Star
Y’know, I basically never watch music videos now that I think about it.
Youtube autoplay and torrenting albums killed the video star.
Scoring clarification below, please ignore if you aren’t into that, it’s boring.
Oh yeah, and reveal clarifications: As stated in the category prompt song and video are worth the same amount. Since songs are usually out of 10 and catfit out of 2 we’ll make both out of 6 to keep it out of the same amount. (10 rating + 2 catfit = 12, 12/2 = 6 points for each)
The bonus points for scoring 8 and 9 on your song will just be divided in half between song and video (rounded up to .3 for breaking 4.8 aka 8, .5 for breaking 5.4 aka 9) and given if you break 8 or 9 on your song or video. Or twice if you do both. I said they’ll be weighted equally this category so they’ll be weighted equally!
>”This is stupid and overcomplicated and I cannot figure out my score” - Strawman who may still be correct because this is kind of stupid
Be quiet you, I’m trying to make this work.
24th:
Laurel skipped this category.
23rd:
XandulsBored - Resentment (ft. Michaela Laws) (video by ReubenThePig080)
I’m fine with power metal but I really don’t like either this vocalist or what she has decided to do with her voice. It’s not enough to make me hate it but it definitely stops me from being able to appreciate the legitimately cool parts of the instrumental. As for the music video, uh, I can’t tell whether it’s supposed to be funny or serious and I’m getting a whiplash that really stops me from taking it as either. Maybe it’s cooler if you like the game.
Total: 2.8 rating + 2.7 video + 1.0 familiarity = 6.5 points
Submitted by RaceBandit
22nd:
nature video - Every Space Shuttle ever launched, in order (set to 64daysofstatic - PX3 & Retreat! Retreat!)
This is really cool but the music and the editing make me feel like I’m sitting at some corporate recruitment event about how cool the space program is and holy shit who decided that their video should be 8 minutes long. I know what NASA does, you don’t have to play all the videos to make me apply to NASA, I’d do it right now if they asked me to, besides the obvious draws a space exploration job would at least mean I’m not indirectly negatively affecting someone as a cog in a hypercapitalistic corporate machine that endlessly sucks money from the underclass in service of-
I mean, uh.
The space program sure is cool, huh?
Edit: I am sorry NASA I can no longer accept your offer, I am already a cog in a hypercaptalistic corporate machine. Also, the space noises playing over the song at points, uh, really interferes.
This song has some really cool strong, mathy, sections but I can’t unhear it just being corporate ‘hype’ music most of the time and it kind of drags on, dulling the impact of parts I do find really cool, which is a shame.
Total: 4.4 rating + 3.6 video + 1.0 familiarity = 9.0 points
Submitted by Bloodbird
21st:
T-ARA - Number Nine
I apologize, for I am a philistine and cannot understand what stands out about this music video. The dancing is good and the backgrounds are pretty cool but it’s nothing that makes me go “Woah, this is awesome”. Oh well, it’s not bad to me either- different priorities I guess. As for the song itself, I do like that weird distorted “NUMBER NINE” sample that plays. I like the song in general really, it’s catchy and fun.
Total: 4.6 rating + 3.6 video + 1.0 familiarity = 9.2 points
Submitted by pisxel
20th:
Hilariously Bad Pakistan Sonic Heroes Happy Meal Commercial - 2004
OUR TENKR HAPPY MEAL TIME
OUR MCDONALDS SEGA GAMES LINE
TAILS SOCCER
SONIC SKATEBOARD
BLORG BAM AMY TENNIS
CREAM PUFF CLOBBER CATCH
SHADOW BASKETBALL
KNUCKLES BASEBALL
CHEESEBURGER FDJLDFSJLFDASJKDFSJK HAPPY MEAL TIME
CHALA CHALA MCDONALDS HE SEGA GAMES LINE
Total: 3.3 rating + 3.9 video + 1.0 familiarity = 8.2 points
Submitted by Moose
19th:
Candlemass - Bewitched
The cheese produced in this one video is equal to that manufactured by the average fromagerie in a year. This isn’t a bad thing, it just means the only thing I can focus on is on how Mr. Marcolin, Honors Algebra II teacher and chess club coach, has decided to film his own sick metal music video. It is fun, and I appreciate it for that and will continue to do so. But unfortunately I cannot move beyond the fun and into headbanging.
Total: 4.2 rating + 4.0 video + 1.0 familiarity = 9.2 points
Submitted by RBY
18th:
apperaat - Wir Bauen Für Sie
This song combines the best elements of synthwave and more traditional techno(?) sort of stuff and I love it. The slower sections manage to be both groovy and interesting while building up to that sick synthwavey chorus that just makes you want to move. The music video itself isn’t something that really draws my attention =, but it’s not bad either. I like when the bald dude wears a devo hat and the minimalistic traffic theme is pretty cool.
…Did I really just say the phrase ‘minimalistic traffic theme’? Could I not have worded that better? …Maybe I could have but now that I’ve commented on it in the writeup I am unfortunately obliged to keep it. Look upon my first draft and laugh at the mildly awkward wording, for you are the audience and I am your humble jester!
Total: 4.9 rating + 4.0 video + 1.0 familiarity + .3 = 10.2 points
Submitted by nutella
17th:
Dirtyphonics - DIRTY
The intro to this song was really cool and then the Skrillix-style dubstep drop hit and I am split. Then the song just kind of repeated and… well, it’s not bad necessarily but there are a lot of let down expectations I had from when this song started that just turned into wub wub and tits. Music video is fine but kind of feels all over the place, like it’s lacking a unifying theme that fits the song. It’s dirty I guess? Sex appeal? Is that the theme?
So yeah, I don’t dislike the sub or anything, I still enjoyed the song, but it’s just really ok to me. I do like the robot that shows up, he reminds me of WKUK’s famed SEX ROBOT (sex robot).
Edit: I have more respect for the cohesiveness of individual sections of the video on a second watch but my opinions mostly stand.
Total: 3.6 rating + 4.1 video + 1.0 familiarity = 8.7 points
Submitted by Lebossle
16th:
EZFG - Igniter
Man, I should download a shader pack every time I watch a lyrics video, this one is pretty good. I particularly like the synchronization between things like the sparks and bursts of sparklers with the song’s backing. It’s what really makes it go beyond spectacle to, y’know, a music video. Song itself is a fun time but not something I’m terribly attached to. Not sure what I’d suggest to remedy that. It’s already pretty hype, maybe more depth in the drums or something? Anyways, fun song.
Total: 4.6 rating + 4.3 video + 1.0 familiarity = 9.9 points
Submitted by Rainshaft
15th:
Baptazia - Super Sunday (audio from MC IC3 & MC Shabba at OneNation Valentines Festival 2007)
Tentative termi read. LET THE POWER OF RAVE COMPEL Y- oh they said a similar line as I was writing this, very good. The song is a banger and the video is… well, I get genuine joy out of watching people jump and dance around and I appreciate that but this presentation just isn’t what I think of when I think “great video”. Regardless, a happy time in both respects.
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Total: 5.1 rating + 4.4 video + 1.0 familiarity + .3 = 10.8 points
Submitted by SchizoAffected
14th:
Metallica - One
Oh hey it’s that band that really wants you to download their music, like, REALLY bad. Used to be really into Metallica (and Megadeath) when I was first getting into metal and didn’t really have internet fast enough to play music on Youtube yet. Good times. Nowadays, well, this is still pretty enjoyable as far as Metallica goes- it’s popular for a reason I guess. Video isn’t bad. A lot of budget-saving shots of the band playing, yeah, but there are also some very cool samples talking about war and euthanasia, ties in with the song well. Shame that it’s dragged down by all the shots of the band but oh well. I still like the content that is there.
Total: 4.5 rating + 4.6 video + .0 familiarity = 9.1 points
Submitted by KarmaDope
13th:
The Sisters Of Mercy - This Corrosion
This music video might not be flashy, but I really dig the grimy, post-apocalyptic art direction going on. The execution is great. As for the song itself, those punching drum noises are great and the background singers add a ton of needed depth. It’s a very fun track.
Edit: bumping this up to the 8 mark, this is catchy
Total: 4.8 rating + 4.7 video + 1.0 familiarity + .3 = 10.8 points
Submitted by Hollowkatt
12th:
Immortal - Call Of The Wintermoon
We kick off grading for this category in glorious 244p. Creatures of the metal are seen in their natural habitat- dense, sprawling forests (which can be found on their album covers), and miscellaneous ruins of vaguely European architecture. This video is laid out in a documentary format, observing the local wildlife engage in rituals such as carrying around torches, dramatically looking at things, and scanning the environ for prey, such as the goth kid.
All and all the song is pleasant if a bit one-note and I find the music video very amusing. Ending is really sudden though, do the album tracks flow into each other?
Edit: I scrolled down to the comments and they’re all making the exact same jokes as me, I’m so unoriginal. Dammit.
Also, I put on my robe and wizard hat.
Total: 4.3 song + 4.8 video + 1.0 familiarity + .3 = 10.4 points
Submitted by Shad
11th:
Citizen - I Want To Kill You
I thought groups of young people in dark forests were supposed to be into worshipping Satan or promoting gay rights or something else the 80s were afraid of, not working out and holding gymnastic ball fights. Anyways, ol’ “I need to clean my fucking car out” dude here goes into the woods and gets kidnapped by “Photogenic young peoples’ forest workout cult” and loses eight pounds in water weight to make the weigh in for his first fight as a cruiserweight boxer so that he can pad wins for someone else.
As for the song I must admit that this isn’t the kind of thing I normally listen to but it is pretty catchy. Like, I still don’t love it but just being catchy is a pretty good plus. Overall pretty good, although I don’t really get the, uh, point to the video if there is one besides what I have already outlined.
Total: 4.6 rating + 4.8 video + 1.0 familiarity + .3 = 10.7 points
Submitted by vanity
9th, Part 1:
ODDKO - Disobey
Not sure why you just sent me a Meta ad, but I’ll review it regardless. Videowise, some of this I just go “Oh well that’s cheesy” (still cool, but cheesy) at, while other parts I’m going “Jesus christ those visuals, holy-”. Really like the strangling headset masks, all the weird cosmic visuals and… I don’t know how I feel about the four torso’d violin playing abomination so I’ll just say it’s striking. As for the song itself, while it doesn’t blow me away, I like it! Fun guitar riffs.
Total: 4.6 rating + 4.9 video + 1.0 familiarity .3 = 10.8 points
Submitted by soah
9th, Part 2:
A Lot Like Birds - Connector
I’d be lying if I went “Yeah, yeah, I TOTALLY get all of this” but I like the music video regardless. The song itself runs on a very fine line between being a little too silly (for lack of a better word, there probably is one) with the sound, but for me personally it toes it well enough that I can just listen to the screaming and go “oooh”. Putting a KarmaDope read down here or… probably not a vanity but it’s not impossible?
Edit: Eh, it does go on a little long. I feel like the impact would be better kept with a 3:30 song and video than a 5:30 one.
Total: 4.6 rating + 4.9 video + 1.0 familiarity + .3 = 10.8 points
Submitted by Aladyyn
8th:
The Armed - Paradise Day
As I recall Quas really likes The Armed and subbed a track from them last walrus. I’ll put down a light Quas read for now. So, like, I’m watching this video, and remember when Whities used to have these deep fried bites that were basically just breading filled with macaroni? You don’t? Well, they served them for like half a year and they were probably destroying me from the inside the few times I got them but fuck those tasted good. I really miss those. Enough to reminisce about them years later at the mere sight of a man getting White Castle’s- oh he’s screaming now.
This music video is moving, and inspires me to permanently injure my vocal cards screeching loudly at karaoke, start a bar fight, and begin a sub-par punk-themed romantic comedy.
Also, is it just me or does this dude kind of look like Neil Ciercierga? Is this what Neil does in his spare time?
Total: 4.8 rating + 5.0 video + .7 familiarity + .6 = 11.1 points
Submitted LordQuas
7th:
POLO & PAN — Feel Good
This video is very technically impressive and does a great job of fitting the mood of the song. I mean, it’s good vibes all the way- the beach episode of music videos, just more fabulous dancing and drinking martinis on the beach and less jiggle physics. Best way I can describe this is something that is aggressively not my style, but that manages to make me not care too much anyways- it’s too comfy for that. Cool sub.
Total: 4.5 song + 5.1 video + 1.0 familiarity + .6 = 11.2 points
Submitted by Eagle
6th:
camhcom - This is (not) the greatest song in the world. (set to Tenacious - Tribute)
Ah, so it’s this. I find it hilarious that this kind of sub is the one where I have to go “Ah yes, I’ve seen this before, very good choice in submission.” If any person who is far more interested in my write ups than even I am has decided to binge through all my walrus writeups and submissions, then my opinions on Tenacious D have probably been made clear- it’s, like, some awesome stuff, goddamn, thanks Jack Black and Kyle. As for Evangelion I, uh, never got past like 2 episodes. Yes, I am aware that there is me singing the Evangelion OP pinned in the channel I’m revealing this in. Personally I prefer the first one of these,
I did (not) mean to blow your mind., but this is cool too.
Edit: man this really makes me want to play the Detroit Metal City/K-On! AMV set to Tribute after the reveal
Total: 5.2 rating + 5.2 video + .4 familiarity + .6 = 11.4 points
Submitted by Martin
5th:
Magdalena Bay - Dreamcatching
Everything melts into one another here, both visually and aurally. The AI does a great job in matching that melty feeling of 1 flowing into 2 into 3, and in ultimately allowing everything to feel like one big trip. Musically I really enjoy how the vocals are produced and I think they do a lot to reinforce this mood. Also, bass strong, strong bass good, thump thump.
Total: 5.2 rating + 5.3 video + 1.0 familiarity + .6 = 12.1 points
Submitted by termi
4th:
Hudson Mohawke - Bicstan
Oh hey it’s the guy I found an album from because it had a really funny cover a while back and then found out was a meme somehow. I should listen through his discography sometime. I only listened to that album and cbat, and only once I believe. Anyways, this is unbearably fun and now you must all experience it with me. MNIN read.
This is the album cover:
Edit: if there are an unlimited number of parallel universe then there is one where this music video was published in Shounen Jump from 1990 to 1996 across 276 chapters instead of Slam Dunk
Total: 5.6 rating + 5.4 video + .8 familiarity + 1.0 = 12.8 points
Submitted by MNIN West
3rd:
Clipping - Blood of the Fang
If this is Brainpan I’ve already listened to this album and song several times, with you to thank I believe, but I didn’t know it had any music videos. An exciting prospect. The bass is as strong as ever, and David Digg’s flow as smooth as ever. Neat concept for the music video: “The "Blood of the Fang" video is inspired by a photo of Huey Newton — co-founder of The Black Panther Party for Self-Defense — hand-cuffed to a hospital gurney while being treated for a gunshot wound in the abdomen after a gun battle with Oakland police in October 1967.”
As for the video itself, the production is great, very cinematic. I like the synchronization between the blood and the music at certain parts. My favorite part is probably the AK-47 filled with organs receiving a blood infusion, it’s a great sort of personification of violence. I’d be lying if I said I could get everything that the creators wanted to get across through the lyrics and the video but that doesn’t change my feelings here.
Total: 5.3 rating + 5.5 video + .3 familiarity + .8 = 11.9 points
Submitted by Brainpan
2nd: (Warning: The following video contains flashing lights, seizures, epilepsy, yada yada
Ken Ishii - Extra
MNIN East read. This is wild. Love the mood to this entire music video- old dark grimy animation. This was directed by the animation director for Akira and that totally tracks. There’s not a huge story built up and closed out in all of 4 minutes, but there doesn’t really need to be either. I’m too busy being enthralled in the atmosphere to really care about that. It’s great. As for the song itself, it has an aggressive tone to it and fits the mood well. Great stuff.
Now that I think about it it has been quite a long time since I’ve watched or read Akira. Maybe it’s time to do it again?
Total: 5.3 rating + 5.5 video + 1.0 familiarity + .8 = 12.6 points
Submitted by MNIN East
1st:
Tool - Jambi
I was wondering if there would be one where there was a big gap between how much I liked the song and how much I liked the video, and after one listen this might be it. Didn’t really pick it up while listening since I always blank on lyrics but after reading the lyrics I like the theme the video and song have going on about fear of loss, and being so close that two people feel like one (although the music video is, uh, more literal about it). Love the style of the video and how it’s shot, as well as the sometimes demented imagery, it’s really cool. I’d be lying if I said I figured out the imagery with all the baby dolls(?) yet but, uh, perhaps I’ll get that later.
As for the song itself, I like the instrumental section a lot more than the vocals. Like, the vocals aren’t necessarily bad, I’m just not a fan of the vocalist I guess, which is kind of a shame. The complex guitar riffs and strong bass make up for that though, and make for a song that I enjoy, if not one that I like so much I’d put on a playlist.
Edit: Yeah I’m not sure if the dolls are all meant to represent them or if that’s just one thing buried within another. I like how those canes have to help them support themselves where the other would before, it helps emphasize how being separated changed them.
Edit Edit: oh the doll-thing at the end is the rose one had and the doll the other had combined, that explains a lot I think
Total: 4.5 rating + 5.6 video + 1.0 familiarity + .5 = 11.6 points
Submitted by Schiavetto
Closer:
t+pazolite - T+ VS SHARK
OH MY GOD IT’S A SHARK